Here are 3 things for you from this week, plus one. But first, a quote.
Just say no" is bad productivity advice. ... Whether at home or at work, when we have clear expectations based on how we intend to spend our time, we can fulfill our obligations to others and to ourselves. Nir Eyal (Read more here.)
1. A stretch does you good.
When the dogs greet me each morning, they stretch their bodies. Even before I open the door, they're ready to go. They expect a few walks a day. Without dogs, I'm not sure I'd walk as much as I do. Their expectations stretch me and start my day off right. This week, I walk only a few times ... one loop (a mile) rather than 2 or more. I take a week off, then slowly start to toddle around the neighborhood as strength returns.
Waldemar's caught whatever I had last week, along with the fatigue, crushing headaches, stomachaches (though he can eat, which I couldn't), and muscle pains. Our doctor friends persuade him to take himself to the hospital. We figure he can get tested for both of us since we have the same thing. And who knows how much it will cost? His fever breaks while he's there. After innumerable tests, medicine, and 7 hours in hospital ($2.50 for all) , he comes home and falls into bed.
He starts to feel better almost right away. Maybe knowing what we have helps. He's much better by week's end. There was no walk in the mountains this week: too many walkers are ill. Several of our acquaintances have been in contact with Covid.
Turns out we have dengue fever. My skin is itchy and feels raw wherever I scratch, even after 2 weeks. For a few days, my hands and feet burned as though they were on fire - a symptom W missed in exchange for joint pains.
A friend - who previously had dengue - warns us that relapses are common. "Just take it easy," she says. Okay. Will do.
Last week, just after I got sick, we recorded 2 Sunday talks at once, one for this week and one for the next.
God knows how to prepare us for rest, doesn't he. At the time, I was sick as a dog, my head pounding and my hands burning. I barely made the walk to the office. Maybe I didn't speak with any energy or conviction. But having this week done means we get a break from recording. (W is still helping with media edits.)
At noon-time Friday, I sit on the porch with waves of chanting around us. Friday noon involves at least a half-hour of voices - sermons, ritual prayers, Islamic readings - called from every mosque and pesantran (Islamic boarding school). Since we live on a hill, I can identify at least half-a-dozen high to low pitches. Many are at peak volume. The buzz of many more from every neighborhood underlies those. We're used to that rhythm of the week after almost seven years here.
The tokay! tokay! of the lizard punctuates the lectures. He's got to be a big one, judging by his voice. he lives somewhere in the garden. We hear him most nights but he's been noisy during the day this week, too. (stock photo)
When Gail Johnson was writing All There, I didn't have time or capacity for edits. But because she's my friend, I did them anyway. She was kind enough to give me a copy of her book, which I'm plowing through, slowly and thoughtfully. The stretch before is rewarded by the stretch and ease to my soul now.
I'd agree with Nir's quote above: don't automatically say no when you think you're at capacity.
Along the way, two neighbors are enjoying the same: when our driver gets our vegetables (and every second week, fresh tilapia), he picks theirs up, too.
Lo and behold, the same cooking genie has transformed 3 old bananas into 3 warm banana breads. They're sitting on the counter when I get home from the office. Delicious. I don't have to think about breakfast all week as I recover, between the banana bread and bubur ayam.
Ruth, who stays at our place this week with her friend Melvina, has brought me a special gift. She hands it over as we sit on the office porch. Her dad's a painter and his tulip study is a delight. The vibrant colors are an immediate "pick-me-up." My friends knows how much I love artwork. Isn't this beautiful?
What could you shift to do real and important work? What can you lay aside to do something more lasting and impactful? In my case, I wrote a talk in advance and asked W to record 2 weeks at a time. He agreed. Did I feel like it at the time? Nope. But I've learned that the prompt in your head is the best direction for the future. What could you do today that would give you a breather another day?
3. Share what you have - or stretch your resources - to bless others.
Be open to unexpected gifts once you start saying yes, too. We met with a friend a few weeks ago. Danny is interested in environmental issues and community service. He's combined the two by turning his property into an organic center, teaching students and tourists about earth care. His farm has a small aquaponic grow operation. We're the happy recipients of fresh produce every week.
Our fridge is full of abundance, which we share whenever we can. Besides bubur ayam (chicken porridge) which is great for the stomach, the freshly washed vegetables make me happy. I tuck snap pea sprouts, kale, or other greens under every scoop of rice and into every bowl of soup. At the back of the fridge shelf, ancient Tupperware boxes full of cookies are stacked high. Laurel and I enjoy those when we need a taste of sweetness.
Veronica brings tomatoes and a cabbage to our place. Suddenly, I'm craving cabbage rolls.
I print out a recipe and send a link for the video instructions to the lady who cooks for us twice a week. She works her magic; my craving is satisfied. Her cabbage rolls are spicier than those my mom and I make, but I am open to new flavors ... especially when I don't have to boil or roll the cabbage leaves. I'll modify the spices next time and double the amount of rice. I suspect that she used pre-cooked rice (nasi) instead of raw kernels (beras, which plumps up 3X the size in cooking.)
I miss tulips in Indonesia. What's exotic in one place grows naturally in others. I've never seen a tulip here - but they are common on the West Coast where we grew up.
As we relax together, I'm reminded again how rich life is because of those who pass through it. It was W's birthday on Saturday, and I ran around trying to make it special and care for him. He got tested again (2nd round) for dengue and his platelet count had dropped again. Rest. And vitamins through guava juice. That was the prescription. DrH sends W some tasty Chinese noodles, a traditional birthday food - enough for all 4 of us, upstairs and down. Veronica sends eggplants - so I make a big pot of baba ganoush, one of my new favorites. I have to freeze it - we have too much food in the fridge.
All day Sunday, we arest. We hand over The Conversation to Sam, Liana, and Josh. W's dizzy reading messages so he stays off media, like I did last week. The media team goes above and beyond to make sure the Gathering of BICOnline runs smoothly.
Our friends send food. So much food. All weekend, we're hungry - our appetites are coming back. I get one picture ... of one of the boxes. Otherwise, we just eat. Udon noodles, date honey, and juice from Sayaka, Martin, and Harun. Noodles and broth from Della. So good. We share with our gals upstairs; and W sighs with satisfaction as the meals are served to him in bed. DrW sends a shepherd's pie made with fish and a cake. I put Claudia's gnocchi into the freezer for tomorrow - but her guava fruits scent the whole kitchen.
There's something about an abundance of food that makes people feel loved. W and I are far from our own families. I say a heartfelt thank you to God for such friends on a weekend that could have felt lonely and exhausting. Instead, we feel cherished. Cared for. Thanks, to each one of you!
Who around you has made your life better? Why not say thank you to them today? Send an email, a text, pick up the phone ... or be really radical and write them a thank you note.
Read more:
Today is a new day. Who is waiting for your attention? Stretch yourself to make them feel welcome and special. Even if it's just a pat on the head for your faithful pets ... open that sliding door already.
*The Lord said, “I will appoint peace as your overseer and righteousness as your taskmaster.” Isaiah 60:17
*You, O Lord, are good and forgiving, abounding in steadfast love to all who call on you. Psalm 86:5
*Jesus was praying in a certain place, and after he had finished, one of his disciples said to him, “Lord, teach us to pray.” Luke 11:1
*The kingdom of God is righteousness and peace and joy in the Holy Spirit. Romans 14:17
Moravian Prayer: Merciful Lord, you know everything, even if we don’t bring our troubles to you. Teach us anew how to pray. Give us the courage to address you daily. Forgive us our sins and never leave us. In your son’s name, we pray.
Gracious God, in a world that tries to sell the belief that kindness and love are weak and get exploited, help us to act justly, love mercy, and walk humbly in your footsteps. Amen.
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