Father's Day to a loving meanie

 

What do you think of when someone says, "Dad"? Is your dad someone who makes you think of God as a loving advocate or an overbearing authoritarian? Is there no middle ground?

We always hear how "good dads" go to sports games, play with their kids, and spend time with their families. My dad participated in our lives, but he did more. He established boundaries of authority and respect that have served us abundantly into adulthood. I'd like to say a big thank you today to a dad who took his fathering seriously. While he enjoyed us, nurtured us, and provided well, he also instilled in us high morals and godly principles.

My father was strict. We all knew he said what he meant and meant what he said. He proved it to us with spankings, groundings, and restrictions.

Yet we never doubted his love. When we had disobeyed and received due punishment, we quit doing wrong, knowing he cared about us enough to set us straight. Being the second child, I landed in the first wave of "this is how good children behave." I guess my older brother and I caught the brunt of "good training." It didn't help that I had a flash temper and minimal self-control as a youngster! Our two younger brothers fared better at the end of the rod. Probably L and I wore Dad and Mom down: surprisingly, our other two siblings turned out fine.

The youngest remarked to me a few years ago, "You know, I never saw Dad discipline us in anger. Dad's attitude was, 'You deserve this punishment, so here it is.' Then we'd be done. He never held over hostility to us kids afterwards or showed his frustration."

Today most Americans would call strict parents like mine "mean" or "cruel." Spanking is out of fashion and illegal as the government overreaches into normal families to try to prevent abuse by evil parents. I deplore abuse and cruelty, let's be clear about that.



However, Dad truly demonstrated how a good parent behaves. Never malicious, he allowed a good appeal. We had open discussions about anything we wanted to talk about around the kitchen table. We weren't afraid of him... unless we knew we were deliberately disobeying. Then we looked over our shoulders, knowing we'd earned what was coming.  

Thanks from the bottom of our hearts, Dad. We love and trust God today because we learned to love and trust you completely.

As a mom of grown kids and an appreciative daughter, here's a word to young dads on their special day of honor. A great parent will not let their child rule the roost and abdicate their responsibility by letting a child run wild. Watching some kids sass and hit their parents, I shudder to think of these crazy adolescents on the loose in a few years. Employers, coworkers, and even prison guards may be cursing these children's irresponsible parents in the future.

Dads, please do your duty. Scripture not only encourages, but demands that you establish and enforce worthy rules and boundaries! Pray and read the Bible with your kids. Go to those games. Hug your kids. Hold down a steady job - even if it's not your dream work - to provide for the family. But don't neglect the core character training God has entrusted to you. No one else can - or will - do it for you. Your kids and their future depend on it! 

Read more:
*Know then in your heart that as a man disciplines his son, so the LORD your God disciplines you. Deut. 8:5 NIV

*Does he who disciplines nations not punish? Does he who teaches man lack knowledge? Psa. 94:10   NIV

*The LORD disciplines those he loves, as a father the son he delights in. Prov. 3:12 NIV

*The Lord disciplines those he loves, and he punishes everyone he accepts as a son.” Heb. 12:6 NIV

*Our fathers disciplined us for a little while as they thought best; but God disciplines us for our good, that we may share in his holiness. Heb. 12:10 NIV