There's no water. "Tanks upstairs are completely empty," W reports. A main pipe for city water ruptured and is being repaired on the next hill. (below, hacking: adding cable wires to existing ones)
Saturday, May 8, 2021
We're always short on water. We normally get 2-3 hours of water in the morning, before the city shuts off the supply for the day. We fill up 2 plastic tubs in the kitchen sinks before the water disappears. 3 big water tanks sit on scaffolding outside the kitchen, tucked into the back of the house. But someone's long shower or a load of laundry easily drains one or more tanks.
"Go easy on the water!" It's one of the biggest adjustments for our houseguests. The place looks normal. W is good at fixing things and I like to decorate. But when you don't have water for an evening shower, when you can't wash clothes or dishes, you become aware of living in a region with a roughly-maintained infrastructure.
We love living here: the people are kind, the food is exotic, the weather is good, and we are constantly astonished by the natural beauty of plants and animals. We enjoy our work, which seems never-ending.
However, even after almost 7 years, we live on the edge of cultural stupidity and cross-cultural fatigue.
On my monthly check-in, my counselor asks about an ongoing headache. (I'm not prone to headaches and it's the first in ages.) "What stressors are part of everyday life for you?" Hmmm. I don't usually think about those - but here are a few, in case they had a bearing on my discomfort.
Maybe, living without things we took for granted growing up?
- A ready supply of water.
- Being able to drive to the store.
- Hot water to the kitchen sink. (Not here. See our arrangement, below.)
- Grounded electricity. (Wear rubber soles or get a shock when plugging something in.)
- Being able to understand the neighborly chit-chat or the frustrated clerk's explanations. Indonesian verbs mostly start with me-, men-, or meng- (= the core word/meaning comes after the prefix and may have -an, -nya, -ku, -kan, etc. as a suffix.) By the time I find the root word, the conversation has moved on; I'm lost again.
Maybe, making polite conversation when you're not sure what people mean, using familiar English words in a different way? And it doesn't help that our first language teachers threw in naughty words just for the fun of it, without explaining the full terms or slang.
Maybe, living with a time-bound European in a country of jam karet (flextime)? Hearing someone who is punctual fret over and over in a culture where few things start at the designated time. (As a reflector, I absorb his stress.)
Maybe the uncertainty of what constitutes politeness and good manners? An appropriate hostess gift? Sometimes I show up with something that doesn't suit the occasion: a candle or baking or a card (into which money should have been inserted, "because why else would you have an envelope?" we are informed...)
Maybe, what to wear or what to say when invited out? The definitions of "ordinary clothes" and "something nice" are vague. We showed up in formal wear to a shirt-and-jeans church service last week. I've worn trousers when the other women come in batik skirts or dresses. Laughing or speaking loudly is considered gauche or low-class.
Maybe, in a culture that circles around and avoids uncomfortable subjects, how direct can you be without offending? For example, if you ask for directions, the person can't tell you they don't know. They will point and say, 'go here and then there' and so off you go ... somewhere. If a shop doesn't have an item, they will say they do ... but not be able to find it. Maaf (sorry). A restaurant will tell you an out-of-season fruit or discontinued menu item is "sold out."
Maybe, making friends in a status-conscious society? Calling out a "good morning" to people on the street who are not considered the same status can be inappropriate. They tolerate our greetings on our neighborhood walks and smile back: we are ignorant bules (white foreigners), after all. (Food stands along our walks, below)
Maybe, the disparity between the rich and poor? It's apparent when passing from a narrow village alley to a spacious neighborhood street, in 10 unevenly spaced steps.
Maybe, the danger of everyday life?
- No handrails on a steep stairwell or at the edge of a second-story balcony.
- Minimal building standards and low value on maintenance. There can be 2'-5' gaps in a sidewalk with a 3'-deep hole underneath. (Everyone walks around or ignores the heaving sidewalks to stroll on the sides of busy streets.)
- Boys and men stand in the middle of busy intersections, waving traffic by with their hands and a small whistle.
- The men who pruned our 30' jackfruit tree climbed up in their flip-flops and stood upright on the branches they were cutting off.
- Houses abut the narrow street, built of brick, corrugated metal sheets, stone, and/or cement. Faded vinyl banners cover the gaps in a roof where the rain pours through.
- An old woman is bent under her load of vegetables for sale.
- A young man balances a bamboo pole with heavy buckets - or sofas - on either end on his shoulder.
- A motorcycle zips by with an enormous bale of grasses tied to the back. Another bike carries 4 teens. Another guy hauls a small refrigerator, squeezing his motorcycle through the gap between an overloaded truck and our car.
3. You shall not misuse the name of the Lord your God, for the Lord will not hold anyone guiltless who misuses his name.
4.Observe the Sabbath day by keeping it holy, as the Lord your God has commanded you. Six days you shall labor and do all your work, but the seventh day is a sabbath to the Lord your God. On it you shall not do any work, neither you, nor your son or daughter, nor your male or female servant, nor your ox, your donkey or any of your animals, nor any foreigner residing in your towns, so that your male and female servants may rest, as you do. Remember that you were slaves in Egypt and that the Lord your God brought you out of there with a mighty hand and an outstretched arm. Therefore the Lord your God has commanded you to observe the Sabbath day.
5. Honor your father and your mother, as the Lord your God has commanded you, so that you may live long and that it may go well with you in the land the Lord your God is giving you.
6. You shall not murder.
7. You shall not commit adultery.
8. You shall not steal.
9. You shall not give false testimony against your neighbor.
10. You shall not covet your neighbor’s wife. You shall not set your desire on your neighbor’s house or land, his male or female servant, his ox or donkey, or anything that belongs to your neighbor.
These are the commandments the Lord proclaimed in a loud voice to your whole assembly there on the mountain from out f the fire, the cloud and the deep darkness; and he added
nothing more. Then he wrote them on two stone tablets and gave them to me. (Deuteronomy 5:6-22)
Prayer: God, we in every culture and nation seek you and want your love. Thank you for showing us what you are like: holy, kind, a God who gives us rest and families, a God who meets our needs and invites us to love him and others. Give us hearts that desire peace with you and our fellows. In Jesus' name, amen.
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