Lent Day 36: Anticipation and dread

Dreaming of good things

I sometimes get the shivers when people say, "I've asked God to give me patience (a kind heart / the ability to love everyone / endurance in trials, etc.)"

Now how exactly do we expect to acquire those - or other - virtues? Is God more likely to answer through magical impartation or by guiding us through deep waters and hard times?

"The fruit of the Spirit is learned by interaction within a community, not in isolation," W said the other day. In other words, when someone frustrates us, we learn to forgive rather than retaliate. We wait rather than barging ahead. We speak kindly rather than responding in anger. Ouch ouch ouch, this process of becoming like Jesus. Sometimes it hurts.

Have you ever thought about the many selfish requests we disguise as spiritual prayers? We pray for good things, but we may just want to look good = patient, joy-filled, loving, and peaceful. However, do we expect to pay the price to achieve genuine character? "Every good and perfect gift comes from the Father of lights, in whom there is no shadow of turning." That's certain, but we forget that each gift is exercised with the darkness pressing in. Given to us where we're dancing in the shadows that swirl around humanity.

Casting off for distant shores

Here's an honest personal reflection as we prepare for a new season: when we're asked if we're excited about moving to Indonesia, I admit to mixed feelings. So many cool things await us: meeting new people, sharing the love of Jesus, and living in new surroundings. Tempering my anticipation are other realities, like the reports from every church planter we've met. (They've said it's been harder than expected. To a person, they admit that they have almost quit many times.) Also, every cross-cultural worker talks about culture shock - of feeling out of place among the unspoken rules and customs everyone else seems to understand. We'll feel the cross some times more than others.

Reality is sometimes even crueler than anticipation. This week I think about how Jesus knew he was going to the cross. He warned his disciples that he would be crucified. But he still had to sweat drops of blood, the agony of "no other way" as he wrestling with his destiny in the garden of Gethsemane. He still had to endure the whipping, the spittle, the mocking laughter of Roman guards, and the shrieks of his fellow Jews demanding his death. The weight of the cross dragged on his bloody back. The nails stamped through his hands and feet. The thud of the cross resounded as it dropped into its holder. Jesus endured hours of pain while bystanders shouted curses and his mother cried nearby.

Expected. Harder than expected.

The world is beautiful because of Him

And oh so worthwhile. The salvation of the world depended on him then. For us, he suffered through pain and sin and sorrows.

W and I are becoming part of a long tradition - people who tell the Story here and there, sharing God's hopes for reconciliation with his creatures. We are not especially adventurous or courageous. Others have been fiercer, more zealous, more ambitious. We know we join a mission already in progress, doing our part along with a host of others. We feel lucky to be called. Blessed to be going. Grateful to be giving. After all, it's God's tale of grace and inclusion that we're sharing.

But this week of the cross, oh this Holy Week that I dread each year because of Christ's suffering -- this last time we will joyfully celebrate Easter at home with family ... Ah, my heart is full and there are no more words.

Read more:

*All look to you to give them their food in due season; when you give to them, they gather it up; when you open your hand, they are filled with good things. Psalm 104:27-28

*But now, this is what the Lord says- he who created you, Jacob, he who formed you, Israel: "Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire,     you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze. For I am the Lord your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior. Isaiah 43:1-3 NIV

*God has not left himself without a witness in doing good—giving you rains from heaven and fruitful seasons, and filling you with food and your hearts with joy." Acts14:17

*And being found in human form, Jesus humbled himself and became obedient to the point of death— even death on a cross. Philippians 2:7,8

*Now I would remind you, brothers, of the gospel I preached to you, which you received, in which you stand, For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also received: that Christ died for our sins in accordance with the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day in accordance with the Scriptures. 1 Corinthians 15:1, 3, 4

Do not take the word of truth utterly out of my mouth. Psalm 119:43

The crowds that went ahead of him and that followed were shouting, "Hosanna to the Son of David! Blessed is the one who comes in the name of the Lord! Hosanna in the highest heaven!" Matthew 21:9

Moravian Prayer: Loving Savior, your entry into Jerusalem was showered with, "Hosanna! Blessed is the one who comes in the name of the Lord!" May our lives continue to shower you with hosannas—you are most blessed. 

Lord, giver of every good and perfect gift, we thank you. May we be your witness for good, helping those in need, bringing joy into their lives, and filling them with your love. Amen.

The quiet wait

Have you ever had to wait? You know something is changing. You're not able to read the outcome of what's coming. You hope it will be good, but the past is still with you - and you're not sure you're going to be able to negotiate the future.

The Saturday between Good Friday and Easter has become an annual day of reflection. Today I look out my office window at a forest of bare branches among the evergreens. Inside those trunks, life starts to stir. The cool nights and warming days trigger sap to move and buds to swell and open.

A few plants are early adapters. The Japanese maples have begun to unfurl; the witch hazel is setting out leaves after dropping its blooms; the sword fern fiddles are peeking out of last year's growth. But the big oaks, maples, and alders? They look deader than dead while their new energy accumulates.

Are you a quick sprout-er or does it take you a while to leaf out?

How do you negotiate the "between" day or days - when what's coming may not be confirmed but the past is too uncomfortable to hold onto? When you're being propelled into the future, whether by choice or circumstances?

1. Remind yourself that God knows the past, present, and future. He's able to help you into - and beyond - tomorrow. Be intentional in asking and listening for His help and counsel. For Jesus' disciples, hope had been crucified. The Messiah was dead. In contrast, God knew the glorious resurrection, the unanticipated wonder of Easter, coming in the morning!
2. Transition is a process. Give yourself grace as you explore, fail, reinvent yourself, and become more than you are today. Like the disciples, you may huddle behind a door in fear. Or you may be like the women, doing the chores of grieving to move on.
3. Let the past rest. You can't change yesterday. Resolve to move ahead with who you are and what you know. Yet don't let the limitations of the past determine the rest of your life.
4. Let the day unfold. Wait and watch. Transition is uncertain, scary, wonderful, awful, delightful, painful, healing, and many other experiences. Emphasize the emotions, actions, and attitudes that will move you forward.
5. Get a coach or mentor while you're negotiating change. Mentors show you what they've done. Coaches help you figure out what you want and how to get there. (NOTE: I have some "free" hours available for phone-coaching. Please contact me if you're interested in being coached. Your benefit: coaching. Mine: hours toward certification.) Trusted friends and family can also help you see where you are and where you're going.
6. Take steps toward the future. There are big and small steps in any change. Sometimes it means journal-ing dreams and hopes; sometimes it means making a phone call or sending an email; sometimes it means moving to another job, a new neighborhood, or another city. However, don't just blindly move. In a rafting metaphor, you have some control of the process: get your paddles and safety gear in the boat and make sure it's in good repair. Be purposeful about pointing the raft into the stream, and then let the current help get you there.
7. Evaluate whether you're moving in a good direction. Change course if you need to. Jesus' disciples spent listening to the risen Christ. The experience of Pentecost empowered them with resources and possibilities beyond their wildest imagination. If they had said, "We've never done this before. It's more comfortable not to think about what God's calling us to do," most of us (2000 years later) would never have known about Jesus.
8. The future is better than the past. God has taught you through family, friends, school, experience. What you know is important. Who you become serves and changes the world around you. Whether one or many are affected, fulfilling your destiny and following your passion is your choice. GO FOR IT!

What transitions have you negotiated? What about the new place surprised you, either in the moment or in retrospect?

Read more:
*You shall eat your bread to the full, and live securely in your land. Leviticus 26:5 NLT

*And taking the five loaves and the two fish, Jesus looked up to heaven, and blessed and broke them, and gave them to the disciples to set before the crowd. And all ate and were filled. Luke 9:16-17 NLT

*Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. 

Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.

And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the Lord’s people. Ephesians 6:10-18 NIV

Moravian Prayer: Jesus, may we recognize you in the miracles of daily life: bread shared; a helping hand; a welcoming embrace. Feed us with your Spirit, so we will be inspired and willing to work toward your just and compassionate realm. Amen. 

Lent Day 40: Grateful

Early on Good Friday morning, I tune in to the YouVersion reader to hear Mark 14-15. Each year, believers read the Story, think about God's love, and say thank you for the sacrifice of Jesus on the cross.

This year it's particularly meaningful to me. I listen and imagine Jesus' Friday, which includes:

• a feast with friends
• warning those expecting promotion and political wins about hardships and sorrow ahead
• fervent prayer to endure and stay the course, if there is no other route forward
• rousing sleeping followers, who fade away instead of supporting you
• betrayal by an insider ... then watching trusted friends melt away
• healing someone who's coming to take you away
• looking a best friend in the eye after he swears up and down that he's never had anything to do with you
• hearing a mob scream for your blood
• a politically-rigged trial results in a death sentence
• humiliation by religious leadership, mockery with a purple robe and thorn crown; then being struck, beaten, beard yanked out, spit upon by foreign oppressors
• needing a stranger's help to carry your load
• 3 hours of excruciating physical pain on the cross, while your mother and supportive women watch and cry
• being shamed in public, knowing that shame will be applied to your family and friends
• calling out the Psalms to focus on God's plan instead of your human desires
• letting go of human desires and life itself, to do the work of God - the work that God could do only through you

I am in tears when the reading finishes. What amazing love! What a sense of mission!

What parts of Easter speak loudest to you? What in your Passion week readings brought you to a grateful pause?

Read more:
*Psalm 40:9-17; Esther 8:1-9:17; Romans 10:1-13

*When you said, "Seek My face," my heart said to you, "Your face, O Lord, I shall seek." Psalm 27:8 (NASB)

*Just as Moses lifted up the snake in the wilderness, so the Son of Man must be lifted up,  that everyone who believes may have eternal life in him.” For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.

For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him. Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because they have not believed in thename of God’s one and only Son. John 3:14-18 NIV

*Jesus came out, wearing the crown of thorns and the purple robe. And Pilate said to them, “Behold the Man!” John 19:5 (NKJV)

Moravian Prayer: We look at the cross, O Christ, and see your abandoned, broken, suffering face – looking upon us only with love. May we deeply feel your gaze, making us more acutely aware of the pain in our world and your love for all. Amen.

Lent Day 35: Thankful for endings

You probably have deadlines looming. Something that you can't wait to finish. I'm there too.

Jesus walked into Holy Week determined to stay on task. He did not abandon his followers, knowing the hardest obstacle was on the horizon.

Imagine knowing that by week's end you will have been killed in a horrible way, disgraced by the manner of death, and deserted by those in whom you've invested your life. Would you have the stamina to give your best teaching, show love most deeply, and graciously give your betrayer an opportunity to repent before exposing your knowledge of his intentions?

This Tuesday, thinking of Good Friday  and the wonderful Easter celebrations ahead, I can hardly fathom God's love for us. His determination to offer us––as his betrayers and antagonists––the chance for reconciliation staggers me to my knees in worship.

What hard thing has God called you to, for which you need his patience, self-control, and perseverance today?

Read more:
*Speak tenderly to Jerusalem, and proclaim to her that her hard service has been completed, that her sin has been paid for. Isaiah 40:2 (NIV)

*I call upon God, and the Lord will save me. Psalm 55:16

*Your eternal word, O LORD, stands firm in heaven. Your regulations remain true to this day, for everything serves your plans. Psalm 119:89, 91

*On God we have set our hope that he will rescue us again. 2 Corinthians 1:10

*Christ himself bore our sins in his body on the cross, so that, free from sins, we might live for righteousness. 1 Peter 2:24

Moravian Prayer: God of the ages, you have been faithful. We confess our faithlessness. As we call upon you today, we know that you have rescued us. You are our hope. Thank you for your grace and love today and every day.

We are so grateful that our debts have been released through the grace of your son, Jesus Chr-ist. May we strive to pay forward the grace and love you have given us. In his name. Amen.