"No refills" on water and good company

Tuesday, November 5, 2024

Dawn arrives shortly after 5:00 a.m. I'm finally well enough to get out the door for a walk. I find some delicate flowers in the garden, which go into a brass vase from Mom.

I can feel the creativity coming back after a break. I post the first food blogs in ages. FB and IG block the posts but no one can figure out why. Someone suggests it's because it's about dates and syrup in the same post. (= DIY date syrup) Maybe?

We're jet lagged but have the blessing of household help. They cook lunch and wash dishes, change our bedding and do laundry.

In previous generations, the household manager was the wife, whether one or both spouses had careers. The household chores and errands belonged to her. Now the chore-masters and managers may be either man or woman ... or both. In our case, W and I have multiple careers: teaching, leading, writing, and speaking. Our helpers free us to do that work. What a blessing they are!

The day is full of calls and meetings. It's a delight to see our team online. Between, I sort old family pictures. Mom and I were young once upon a time.

Our parents traveled to Africa and South America to do charitable work in their 40s.

 

I loved my little cousins. I send them the pictures Dad took 30-50 years ago of happy times as a big family. Here they're on an auntie's porch, probably at a family dinner.

This cousin was a special favorite, with a birthday 2 days after mine.

I was bridesmaid for my older brother way back when. I thank God for good memories as I flush old emails and photos.

After a final evening call, we relax and read. It's a good night of sleep: 7 hours. (Mind you, the hours are 7:00 p.m.-2:00 a.m.)

Wednesday

Another walk, another day. My energy is back, though my lung aren't clear yet. There are fresh blooms in the dirt along the road.

This tiny yellow fruit hides under its vine.

I'm in the mood to cook. I bake a potato/oatmeal/vege something-something for breakfast. Not bad with sweet soy and spicy sauces. I make a pot of soup with the white beans I find in the freezer. I'm using up stored foods since we're back to movie night and other events that need freezer/fridge space.

A friend posts wise advice about not worrying about the future. What a good reminder for me. I've never been a worrier but I've also never liked waiting for the next season. Small steps of obedience, and we'll get there.

In the late afternoon we watch the incoming American election results. Since we don't live there, we felt we didn't have the right to vote. However, as we did for Indonesia's election last year, we've been praying over the people and the government.

W and I read through Sunday's talk and enjoy the mild weather on the Porch. Coming home to 64o/18o nights and 80o/27o days? Wonderful. I'm in long sleeves and trousers because the mornings are too cool. The sun doesn't break through for long so it stays mild and pleasant all day long.

At night, rainstorms sweep the mountains, clear the air, and wash the garden. The rain and sunshine make plants like this one (4'/1.3m tall) glow. I love the bright yellow of the recent leaves at the top with the black ones near the bottom, don't you?

Thursday

W and the dogs hike in the mountains without me. Melvi makes 5 table arrangements from Titik's big Sunday flowers.

There's enough for a bigger "messy" bouquet as well.

For supper, I add some coconut cream to yesterday's soup and call it good.

It's planned as a quiet day of catching up and resting. It's not quite as relaxing as we hoped but we appreciate the prayers and both sleep well. 

Friday

Ibu Siti rubs out the kinks from last week's homecoming, a marathon of travel. Then Judy and I have coffee. She's a treasure: we can be open, honest, and outspoken or watchful and prayerful together.

An odd thing happens at #karnivor.2. I order tea. I want black tea but they have only have fancy teas so I choose the least flavored option. The tea steeping gadget is cool and holds tea leaves and a cup of water. That quickly disappears and I'm ready for more. 

"No refills," says the server. Can I buy hot water for a second infusion? He reluctantly agrees and charges me $2 for a bottle of "mineral" water (plain water) that someone apparently heats up. The bar has a hot tap! and made tea that way the first time. Why not refill from that? 

But, "cannot do." There's no thinking outside the box of instructions that servers are given. We experience that over and over, not just today.

At noon, W and I head for Ethnic. I choose rice oncom while W has pepper steak - for about the same price as the mid-morning pastry and 1 portion of sushi earlier.

We enjoy time together. We're still feeling comatose by late afternoon and wide awake some nights. Another week and we'll be completely adjusted to our time zone.

Saturday

We walk 2 miles and remark on the 4-storey apartment that's being erected in our neighborhood. Before, this was a small one-storey house. 

WhatsApp's AI produces thumbs up and other emojis from gestures. We call the grandkids and they learn how to set off fireworks in their background. They're so much fun.

Later, Maddie drops by for a visit on the Porch.

Read more:

*David praised the Lord in the presence of the whole assembly, saying, “Praise be to you, Lord, the God of our father Israel, from everlasting to everlasting. Yours, Lord, is the greatness and the power and the glory and the majesty and the splendor, for everything in heaven and earth is yours.

Yours, Lord, is the kingdom; you are exalted as head over all. Wealth and honor come from you; you are the ruler of all things. In your hands are strength and power to exalt and give strength to all. Now, our God, we give you thanks, and praise your glorious name. 1 Chronicles 29:10-13

*Jesus said to Martha, “I am the resurrection and the life. Those who believe in me, even though they die, will live, and everyone who lives and believes in me will never die. Do you believe this?” John 11:25-26

*There are varieties of activities, but it is the same God who activates all of them in everyone. 1 Corinthians 12:6

Moravian Prayer: Great “I Am”, as humans, we too often bicker and debate over how to worship you. Our experiences and preferences can get in the way of our focus on you. Rid us of these distractions and focus our attention on your mission every moment of the day.

Lord Protector, you bring life from death. With wounds healed and tears dried, our faith in you endures. Thank you. In Jesus’ name, we pray. Amen.

A Whoosh here and there - and 25 good years

Saturday, November 2, 2024

At 6:45 a.m., PakG takes us to the station to catch a feed train to the next city. It's our first time riding the much-promoted Whoosh high speed train to Jakarta. It doesn't stop in Bandung proper where most people live. There's a station almost an hour west of the city and one on the far east side of Bandung. Hence, Bandung people take a 20-minute "train to the train."

Most expats now live in that place, which feels like an old-fashioned American city. It has an IKEA, Western-taste restaurants, a good international school, and curbs on the street. Plus now, Whoosh can take workers into Jakarta in a half hour - without the dangers and stop-and-go of the toll road.

We can't fault those who crave orderliness for choosing to live in that city. In contrast, Bandung is messy, winding, and exciting. We love being here and don't have children who need that level of education.

The ride is smooth and comfortable, whizzing past rice fields, factories, and villages. The train hits 347km/hr (215mph) and deposits us in Jakarta in a half hour. However, the total travel time is almost as long as driving a car. It takes 3 hours between taxis, stations, transfers, and wait times. We go to the wrong Jakarta venue first and walk in the hot sun to catch another Grab to the right place. 

I usually don't mind walks and waits, but my body is starting to go under. After the third long wait and walking to thoroughfares so Grab drivers can find us, I've had enough. "I don't care about saving $2-3 per ride across the city. Can we just hop into a taxi that's waiting at the curb?" W agrees.

We don't want to miss the 25th anniversary of IES Jakarta. They're a role model for putting living faith into practice. The internationals and locals of IES work together to meet spiritual needs and serve the poor in their city and beyond.

Pastors Dave and Gigi and their team are among our heroes in the faith. The IES planners and volunteers ensure a smooth morning of door prizes, fun, and community-building. Everyone has a great time.

One of the values of IES is FOOD!!! There's an amazing spread, with abundance left over when it's said and done.

We know many of the team from past visits or from when we first arrived in Indonesia - they made us feel welcome 10 years ago.

In the evening, we gather at the hall for a time of reflection and remembrance. Then we eat at the Lord's Table together (also called Communion among Protestants, or mass for Catholics). I like the little verses on each wafer, representing the body of Christ that was broken for the sins of the world.

Dave and Gigi pray over us and thank everyone for working together to love God and love the world.

We do the trip in reverse and fall into our own beds at 10:00 pm. My cold erupts into full-blown misery at night, accompanied by sneezing, a sore throat, and a dripping nose.

Sunday

We wake after a few hours. My head is pounding so hard that I sit up. I warn W off - "Stay away! You don't want it." He agrees.

We stay home instead of passing germs to our friends at IES Bandung. Pak Chandra and the team have things well in hand. He shares his story of cancer recovery and how God accompanies us as we endure suffering. His guiding scripture during cancer treatment was Psalm 46:10: "Be still and know that I am God."

Indonesians love noise and chaos. Once in a while, there's an event across the street from the hall. Today is one of those days, with ear-blasting singing followed by various men shouting through their microphones. There are competitions of some kind - it escalates into guys screaming over loudspeakers (not joking) to ramp up the crowd!

Thankfully, Chandra is not bothered by the din and continues to speak. It is a blessing and encouragement to join the service online. Sunday Gatherings are woven into our DNA and staying home feels odd.

Titik drops the hall flowers on the Porch - oh wow! It's a welcome home surprise.

The living room is prettier with her work.

I'm craving soup mid-morning and for a late lunch. Did you know that leftover lettuce is a good soup vegetable? I heat broth (frozen after a movie night), leftover curried veggies, and mini gnocchi that we brought from Seattle. It's a 5-minute meal: immediate, hearty, and sustaining.

I sort old emails and clear digital files. I find some letters from my dad, encouraging me to work and not let anyone's fears or personal rules stop me. It's like hearing his voice again. I often hear his voice in my head, though marriage to a very different kind of adviser has severely tempered how I live out his advice. One time, Dad wrote me:

... Most organizations consist of people whose number one goal is to assure they make the right impressions on their cohorts.

So, cheer up, this will probably be the pattern you have to contend with no matter what you do. Don't even bother with these people -- get rid of  them immediately. Tell them they do not fit. Go out and get those that will do the job. You'll find there are still people around that are happy to get something done. Of course people will then say you are hard to work for, get along with -- they said the same about Christ. Remember in Maslowe's theory only those people that have the confidence in their God-given abilities have the freedom to get things done.

God has a plan/work for you and W. The problems are just part of this -- not to worry or get frustrated, but to resolve or just leave in His hands. Remember the song:  "why worry when you can sing".

Love you,
dad

I am cheered, reading his counsel. He'd say: "Don't let anyone squeeze you into their box. Live as who God made you, not to satisfy others' expectations." Oh Pop, I miss you!

I love the old photos, too. This grandchild is now 13 ...

Some of these women have moved on, but several continue to be mentors and friends even after 12 years. I delete emails with personal content after forwarding them back to their writers, 7-15 years after they were written. (No need for anyone to read them in the future.)

I used to post hand-written letters back to their writers after a decade or two. Why? We forget so much in the journey of life and faith. Our own words can remind us of God's faithful love and care. He is utterly trustworthy.

Monday

I call my mom early. We pray for each other and I read her one of Dad's emails about my struggles at work. We agree - he was a gifted and visionary leader.

Sleep has been short the past nights (thanks, jet lag.) I have a blazing headache again. Flu symptoms flare during morning calls. One conversation is particularly useful for planning the months ahead. I write down what I learn. I have many notebooks of notes that I peruse when I need sound advice.

I keep refilling tea in the tallest Contigo thermos to hydrate. Three 16oz (500ml) infusions later, let's have breakfast.

I baked apple oatmeal bars and made date syrup yesterday. Yum.

By 10:00, calls are done, emails are sent, and a dozen tissues land in the garbage. I write instructions for the helpers and cancel my appointments for the next 2 days. Rest is the best solution toward a speedy recovery.

Read more:

*My heart, O God, is steadfast, my heart is steadfast;

    I will sing and make music.

Awake, my soul! Awake, harp and lyre!

    I will awaken the dawn.

I will praise you, Lord, among the nations;

    I will sing of you among the peoples.

For great is your love, reaching to the heavens;

    your faithfulness reaches to the skies.

Be exalted, O God, above the heavens;

    let your glory be over all the earth. Psalm 57:7-11

*The Lord will open for you his rich storehouse, the heavens, to give the rain of your land in its season and to bless all your undertakings. Deuteronomy 28:12

*Therefore, my beloved brothers and sisters, be steadfast, immovable, always excelling in the work of the Lord because you know that in the Lord your labor is not in vain. 1 Corinthians 15:58

Moravian Prayer: Giver of all, your grace abounds. We serve you in faith and hope, sharing with others the love for which we are filled. We give you thanks. Amen.

3 things about heart-friends

We only meet every few years because we have a hard time finding a date when we're both free. But when we meet, my soul feels like it has feasted.

1. Friends have history. I had lunch today with a heart-friend of almost 40 years. Bonnie roomed with me in college for two years, rescuing me from almost certain extinction due to a previous roommate, who smothered me by shadowing me everywhere. B knew what she did/n't want and didn't need to define herself by our friendship. She was happy to be herself, funny, and pragmatic as we students were wrestling with who we would become. Those schoolmates have disappeared and we're older women who see the tracery of God's plan across the landscape of our lives. (However, funny stories remain forever, like our midnight raid on the guys' dorms during finals week ... which we confessed to dear Doc Holdcroft - our college president - after 25 years.)

2. Friends stay connected over time. After we graduated, we stayed in touch, occasionally meeting or writing letters. My letter about expecting our first son crossed the mail with her own announcement to me. (Our sons were born a month apart.) Then we had a daughter each. Our kids grew up, moved out, got jobs, and gave us a few grandkids.

We tried to say hi or schedule a visit on Boxing Day annually. Through the years, there were more misses than hits in connecting. Whenever we met, we remembered what we were like as young women and caught up on the people we knew in college. And we shared what God was doing around us in our husbands, kids, work, and church.

3. Friends keep Jesus at the center. We've exchanged our challenges and prayer requests as the years skipped by from decade to decade. I could depend on Bonnie to hear from God and share that with me.

We've marveled that life gets simpler, even when it doesn't get easier. Our focus intensifies as the main thing really takes hold of us (= our relationship with God). And the periphery - the stuff of life - though stressful and heartbreaking at times, draws us in closer, where we trust and love God more.

We don't know if we'll meet in person again. She's moving to a small Canadian community I've never visited, while we're off to Asia.

As we talked today about how God has aligned our gifts with our calling, we were both amazed. She loves to sing, worship, and serve people with special needs. I like studying, writing, and speaking.

We're so different. But we're similar because at our center is Jesus and his Kingdom. When we paused to pray after lunch, our hearts entwined again. She promised to support us in prayer and I did the same.

She asked of God: "May your Kingdom come on earth [in each of us] as it is in heaven." (Matthew 6:10)

"Ah yes please, Lord Jesus," my heart answered. "Walking in the way of your laws, we wait for you; your name and renown are the desire of our hearts. (Isaiah 26:8)

What a gift Bonnie is! Between times, we assume the other is growing in grace. We've prayed for each other since we were young. And we continue to do so. Each time we meet, I'm astonished at how I can trust her with my life.

God, today I want to thank you for this dear friend. Bless her, her family, and her calling. Let your face shine on B and other friends so dear.

These special heart-friendships are your gifts of grace, your compassion and favor on us. We could not conjure them up nor solicit such depth of feeling.

On this pilgrimage, you display your care by sending us fellow travelers who experience life's purpose and meaning from many vantage points. Through their faithfulness, we learn more about you and your Spirit among us.

We are so grateful. Help us to be a blessing to them as they are to us. Amen.

Who are your heart-friends?

Lent Day 3: Who are you with?

Who are you with? And who is with you?

Last morning, I met with credentialed women (including a pastor, therapist, and missionaries), cup of tea in hand.

I had lunch and shared our new calling to Indonesia with 15 women. They've met for decades to pray for missionaries and each other. Most are in their 70s-90s. The food was home-cooked, the company warm and inviting, and the prayers sincere.

Finally, W and I relaxed with six dear friends in a nearby suburb. The candles were lit, the cheesecake looked delicious (can't have any = Lent, but it looked good!), and the conversation and prayers were uplifting.

We don't often get so many hugs and affirmations in a day. When we do, we tuck them away to treasure as memories later.

Jesus likewise drew a small circle around him. He had many followers surrounding him with their curiosity, interest in the things of God, and their needs.

His transparency - the laughter, the jokes, the crying, the preaching, the teaching - amazes me. There was no coverup or pretense. No hiding behind social conventions. He asked his closest friends, "Are you with me? Who do you think I am?"

And he felt abandoned and lonely when they fell asleep and left him to pray on his own. "Couldn't you hang out just for an hour?" he asked them. He needed their support and companionship for the final walk to crucifixion.

I wonder, would you and I have stayed awake? Would we have stayed close if our Friend was threatened and on the road to the cross? Probably not.

Would you and I have understood the enormity of Jesus' accomplishments in life and death? Could we have grasped the power of the resurrection? That's doubtful, too.

Yet Jesus invites us to live in His presence - today, tomorrow, and every day. Knowing how imperfect, how faithless, and how fickle we are, He says, "Come. Drink of the water of life. Come close. Find abundant life with Me and in Me."

Today I say, "I'm with you, Jesus. I'm in!" Then, when I dash away, distracted or look away, ashamed by my sleepiness or sin, I'm coming back.

You also? Who are you with today?

Read more:
*David found strength in the Lord his God. 1 Samuel 30:6 NIV

*O LORD, you are my God; I will exalt you; I will praise your name, for you have done wonderful things, plans formed of old, faithful and sure. Isaiah 25:1 ESV

*For freedom Christ has set us free. Stand firm, therefore, and do not submit again to a yoke of slavery. Galatians 5:1 ESV

Moravian Prayer: God, lift us. Hold us. Support us. Empower us. Grant us the courage to throw off the shackles of sin. We long to stand before this world worthy to be called the people of God. Strengthen us, O Lord! Amen.

LAUGHTER: Day 2 with my accountability group

Who on earth are you? Asian facials

 Oh did we laugh!

We doubled over, shaking with mirth until the tears streamed down our cheeks behind the masks. We'd patted on Asian facial masks last night - and then couldn't stand the sight. We took goofy pictures and made faces at each other, while talking about our relationships with friends and family (between chuckles, of course.)

Laughter has always been part of our journey together. I first met Patti in 1992, when she was nurse for the children's choir camp I'd inherited at the last minute. Our camp manager reneged on his responsibilities, so leadership fell on me two weeks before camp started. We rallied volunteers, packed over 100 kids into busses, and had a fantastic week.

Our wacky friendships

Across the hall from my room was the nurse's station. Patti bandaged hearts and limbs as the children streamed in and out.

On the final night, Patti and I walked across the parking lot to the hall where parental volunteers were putting on a show for the kids. She'd painted a big red cross on a white girdle, perching it on her head as a "nursing cap." Over her thrift-store white tennis skirt, she'd pulled a blue cape. White knee-highs topped her white sneakers. Patti schlepped a little blue suitcase as a pretend medical bag. Honestly, she looked like a nurse from a madhouse.

We laughed so hard that we kept having to stop to cross our legs (first time I ever considered the value of Depends). We howled, and barely made it to the show. Oh, how that memory still makes a smile break out!

Hugs after dinner

Patti and I built a solid friendship over the next year, shrieking with laughter at IKEA in Vancouver, talking about homeschool, and studying scripture. In the autumn of 1993, we called Phyllis, a mutual acquaintance, asking if she'd like to form a group with us. "Is it confidential?" she asked right off the bat. "And why would we meet?"

"Yes," we replied. "Utterly confidential. And we'd meet for spiritual accountability." She was in. Then in January 1994, Wilhelmina joined us and the circle of four was complete.

We have laughed and cried our way through sicknesses and health, family transitions, relationship crises, and financial windfalls and reversals. We've showed up for showers, birthdays, weddings, funerals, and celebrations.

Last evening, I thought my heart would burst with gratitude, even as my belly was shaking, looking at the dear, funny faces of my friends.

The house where we laughed and cried
our way during 12 years of retreats

Who do YOU laugh and cry with? Can you trust them completely? Are you committed to praying for their well-being? Determined to keep their secrets safe, as they keep yours?

It took prayer and hard work to bond as a group. But the years of laughter and joy - as well as many tears - have more than repaid our efforts. We've done some pretty funny things over two decades.

Thanks be to God, who laughs - and cries - with us.

What good friends do

 Sitting in Maltby Cafe this morning with my friends, I realize that good friends:

1. Share their hearts, in good times and bad.
2. Listen to each other, taking in non-verbal communication as well as what is said.
3. Love each other, regardless of how sweet or mean their friend feels.
4. Pay attention to each other, noticing what's important to the friend today.
5. Hold each other accountable for good actions and attitudes. Stinkin' thinkin' gets rooted out by good friends.
6. Pray for each other regularly, knowing that God is at work in their friend.

I'm so grateful for my friends.

Do you have people who walk through life with you in these ways?

Read more:
*Listen to me, my people, and give heed to me, my nation; for a teaching will go out from me, and my justice for a light to the peoples. Isaiah 51:4 NLT

*Paul said, “I stand here, saying nothing but what the prophets and Moses said would take place: that the Messiah must suffer, and that, by being the first to rise from the dead, he would proclaim light both to our people and to the Gentiles.” Acts 26:22-23 NLT

*I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. I do not set aside the grace of God, for if righteousness could be gained through the law, Christ died for nothing! Galatians 2:20-21 NIV

Moravian Prayer: Lord Jesus, as poor sinners, we love darkness rather than the light. Help us to walk in your light and to witness to its power. You commissioned us to tell all people the good news of God’s love. Give us strength to fulfill that charge! Amen.

Lent Day 23: Only one of you and only one of me

Think you're all alone? Too insignificant to make a difference? Ever ask yourself, "What can one person do, anyway?"

Rethink that assumption as you listen to this (click here). This one person with persistence and his gifting creates a sound experience not to be missed!

Some of  biggest eye-openers and influences come through people interacting in ones and twos. This past week, I interacted with:

1. Family: Mom and Dad came for a visit. I talked to Mom on the phone. Our kids came for lunch. Our granddaughter spent a day with us.
2. Friends: I just got back from tea with a dear looooong-term girlfriend who provided insights and advice. Within the past few days, I've talked to my WPPRs accountability group (four women, meeting for over 20 years). A friend and I watched her toddler and my grandchild play in the park.
3. Mentors: Several peer mentors directed my self-examination, helped me edit, suggested work possibilities, and opened the door for a board position.
4. Church: Two pastors in particular spoke into my life. (Sudden AHA, anyone?)
5. Acquaintances: The gal I walk with after exercise class taught me about Alabama and life as a live-in partner (vs. marriage).
6. People I've never met: Online and in books, the creativity in pictures and words inspires me. I love reading blogs and thinking about the sub-text (the unspoken agendas behind and under the photography, painting, and writing). Sometimes my readers respond with stimulating questions or life experiences, encouraging me to step forward in my own thinking. I LOVE hearing from you!

Who needs you? How will the world be changed because you woke up today and gave the day everything you had - your gifts, talents, education, friendship, skills, history, and more?

Whom do you need? Could you write out a list like mine above? To whom would you send a thank you note or email? Who has touched your life recently?

Read more:
*In my distress I called upon the Lord; to my God I cried for help. He heard my voice. Psalm 18:6

*I pray to you, Lord, in the time of your favor; in your great love, O God, answer me with your sure salvation. Psalm 69:13 (NIV)

*Paul said, “To this day I have had help from God, and so I stand here, testifying to both small and great.” Acts 26:22

*Devote yourselves to prayer, keeping alert in it with thanksgiving. Colossians 4:2 NLT

Moravian Prayer: God, teach us to pray: to know the comfort and power that comes from open hearts. Move us to pray often this day: prayers of gratitude, petition, or praise. Meld our words with our actions, gentle God, so our very lives become a prayerful response to you.

We often call upon you, Lord, expecting easy solutions when what we need to recognize is your presence and strength. Thank you for trusting us to live one day at a time and for assuring us that we are never alone. Amen.