Facing our fears

Do you ever feel afraid? Let's talk about that today.

As part of my transparency in this journey toward Indonesia, I admit times of fear. Terror. Dread. Reluctance.

Why? I'm a free-fall planner. That is, I work out details and alternatives in advance. But when push comes to shove, I go with the flow, changing my expectations and responses as life happens.

That doesn't mean I'm always happy with a change of plans. It doesn't mean I don't wonder if things will work out. And it doesn't mean I'm never afraid. (Adrenaline kicks in as the current takes my life-raft down the river. Off we go! The emotions and the possibility of disaster hit me afterwards.) Baring a few crashes, things have worked out pretty well so far.

Which of these common fears has crossed your mind?

• The unknown: what if life is completely different than expected? Can we adapt?
• Expectations: what if we're not good enough? If we don't meet the expectations of self or others?
• Being overwhelmed: what if we get stressed out and can't cope?
• Failure: what if we flop? Miss the mark? Miss the whole target? What happens then?
• Harm: what if we get hurt? Ill? Die?
• Abandonment: what if we're forgotten? "Out of sight, out of mind" became a cliche for a reason.
• Making the wrong decision: what if we take the wrong fork in the road? Can God redeem our mistakes?

Here's what I've learned from facing my own fears:

1. God never changes, though people and circumstances may. "For I the Lord do not change; therefore you, O children of Jacob, are not consumed" (Malachi 3:6; also Psalm 90:2); and "Jesus Christ, the same yesterday, today, and forever" (Hebrews 13:8).
2. God knows what's coming, even when we don't. We may anticipate things that never happen, expending energy on useless worries. (Read Psalm 23 for assurance.)
3. He is with us. Moses, Gideon, and other leaders experienced "God With Us." Jesus was that promise (Matthew 1:23).
4. God is big enough to cover everything we can't control: "I am the Alpha and the Omega," says the Lord God, "who is and who was and who is to come, the Almighty" (Revelation 1:8).
5. God has our backs when we fail or don't live up to expectations: Jesus continues to be our intercessor and Savior. "Who is to condemn? Christ Jesus ... is at the right hand of God, who indeed is interceding for us" (Romans 8:34); and "A person is not justified by works of the law but through faith in Jesus Christ, so we also have believed in Christ Jesus, in order to be justified by faith in Christ and not by works of the law, because by works of the law no one will be justified" (Galatians 2:16).
6. Though we are limited, God is limitless. Acknowledging God's infinite power and ability, assures us that we don't have to manage the world (or ourselves). Job replied to the Lord: “I know that you can do all things; no purpose of yours can be thwarted. You asked, ‘Who is this that obscures my plans without knowledge?’ Surely I spoke of things I did not understand, things too wonderful for me to know" (Job 42:1-2).
7. We're going to be okay. Troubles certainly will come but God promises rescue. We might as well trust God and move ahead. "From the ends of the earth I will cry to You. When my heart is overwhelmed, lead me to the rock that is higher than I" (Psalm 61:2). Jesus said, "Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God; trust also in me" (John 14:1).
8. God will bring people alongside, if we are willing to ask for - and accept - their advice and help. "Moses’ father-in-law said to him, 'This isn’t the right way to do this. It is too much work for you to do alone. You cannot do this job by yourself. It wears you out. And it makes the people tired too. Now, listen to me. Let me give you some advice. And I pray God will be with you.' ... So Moses did what Jethro told him" (Exodus 18:17-19, 24).

What fears are you facing? What (and who) will help you face today and the future?

The bridge from here to there

When you write every day, there's a lot to write about. Like any other habit, writing feeds itself.

My spotty blogging since Lent makes it harder to write. A head and heart in transition splash bursts of energy rather than flowing in a steady stream onto the page. I am in transition.

A transition is defined as "the process or a period of changing from one state or condition to another." It can be a scary passage if we don't know the destination. The old place or way of doing things is behind us. But the new way is still unformed or unseen.

Between? It's the bridge from what came before to what comes next.

Sometimes transitions feel like a rock-solid path. Though we may not know what's at the end of the journey, we have secure footholds and hand grips. We walk steadily along.

Other times, change feels more like the swaying of a rope bridge between two hills. Each step rocks the structure while we grab tightly to whatever can steady our gait. We may trip, jog a little, hold our breaths to stand still while we stabilize our balance ... and wonder if the whole thing will spill us into the river below.

The wonderful thing about every "then and now" is that Jesus is with us. He knows every handhold. Every footstep. The One who guarded us yesterday guides us today ... and understands all the details of tomorrow. No matter how difficult or thrilling the moment, He holds our hand.

Scripture even says, "Underneath are the everlasting arms." I like to think about a God who bolsters us when we're slipping or sliding over icy patches or feel too tired to keep going.

Let's trust God for our today: tomorrow's coming. It will be no surprise to God - even if it's completely out-of-the-ordinary for us!

Read more:

*Then Jacob made this vow: "If God will indeed be with me and protect me on this journey, and if he will provide me with food and clothing, and if I return safely to my father's home, then the LORD will certainly be my God. And this memorial pillar I have set up will become a place for worshiping God, and I will present to God a tenth of everything he gives me."

Genesis 28:20–22 NLT

*May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer. Psalm 19:14 NIV

*He who forms the mountains, who creates the wind, and who reveals his thoughts to mankind, who turns dawn to darkness, and treads on the heights of the earth—the Lord God Almighty is his name. Amos 4:13 NIV

*Who knows? God may relent and change his mind; he may turn from his fierce anger, so that we do not perish. Jonah 3:9 NLT

*God has destined us not for wrath but for obtaining salvation through our Lord Jesus Christ, who died for us, so that whether we are awake or asleep we may live with him. 1 Thessalonians 5:9-10

*Moravian Prayer: God who destines us for salvation and changes his mind in our favor, grow our faith to understand this complex truth evident in Christ Jesus. May our witness reveal your hopefulness and ever expanding compassion. Amen.

It's a wonderful life

My sabbatical came to a crashing halt Sunday. While W represented NU in Montana, I enjoyed the NWMN conference in Coeur D'Alene, Idaho, until Wednesday. My coaching and ministry friends and I visited throughout the event. What fun! I appreciate the investment of friends old and new in us.

In two weeks, I start TESOL classes (teaching English to speakers of other languages). Seattle is full of non-English speakers, so I've wanted to take the course for a while. Since NU offers the 4 semesters required for certification in 4 weeks of summer school, I might as well plunge in.

When that's done, we're on our way to teach in SE Asia. W gets to teach theology, which he loves. I still have course prep to finish: as usual, it's a course new to me and not my main interest. Thank God for faculty friends who loaned me their notes. I'm teaching their courses in their names. (Thanks, Lois! and Barbara.)

We've found good house-sitters, which helps make the time away easy. Our big family reunion and a 60th anniversary arrive in August, but we will celebrate that at our cabin. So... life is swiftly moving along. I'll be training for a new job, come fall. More on that later.

It's time to catch a deep breath and plunge right in!

How can we transition in busy seasons, where everything we've done comes together into "whatever that looks like next"?

1. Know who we are and who God is. Get our bearings before we cross the bridge of transition or launch the boat for the distant shore.
2. Know what we love and want to do. What makes our hearts sing? What's a good fit? (On the flip side, what would we most dread doing, no matter what the paycheck?)
3. Gather our assets. Pull together the education, experience, and other resources - including friends and coworkers - who will help us realize the future.
4. Write down a plan and our action steps. (If you can't figure those out, get a coach. I'm one, and would love to help you in a session or more. You'll be amazed how much you accomplish in a coaching hour!)
5. Begin to move in the direction of the next thing. Use what we know, because some parts of a new season won't appear until we're on our way.
6. Gather advisers - spiritual, mental, emotional, even physical - who are willing and ready to assist us. Let's listen to them and let their counsel guide our transitional process. 
7. Make sure God is with us each step of the way. Keep our spiritual flame alight and "hot": this is not the time to reduce our spiritual disciplines and devotions.
8. Embrace change. Transition is a wild uncertain ride, filled with joys and traumas. We're leaving behind the past for an unknown future. If God is in it, we'll be okay. And the future will be more astonishing and crazy-wonderful than we can imagine.

Read more:

*I will exalt you, my God the King; I will praise your name for ever and ever. Every day I will praise you and extol your name for ever and ever. Great is the Lord and most worthy of praise; his greatness no one can fathom. Psalm 145:1-3 NIV

*I will make with you an everlasting covenant. Isaiah 55:3 NLT

*For this reason we must pay much closer attention to what we have heard, so that we do not drift away from it. For if the word spoken through angels proved unalterable, and every transgression and disobedience received a just penalty,  how will we escape if we neglect so great a salvation?

After it was at the first spoken through the Lord, it was confirmed to us by those who heard, God also testifying with them, both by signs and wonders and by various miracles and by gifts of the Holy Spirit according to His own will. Hebrews 2:1-4  NASB

*We do not want you to become lazy, but to imitate those who through faith and patience inherit what has been promised. Hebrews 6:12 (NIV)

Moravian Prayer: Lord, you named yourself “I Am that I Am” – a title of stability in a world that is confusing and ever changing, with new aims and ways to achieve them almost daily. Satisfyingly, we keep our eyes fixed on you, our one destination, knowing its way. Amen.

Lent Day 31: Hello and goodbye

Do you ever get attached to something, only to have it move on or change? Maybe you've had:

• friendships that nurtured you become broken or diminished by a move, a change of life-season, or other reasons.
• a child with aspirations and dreams, except they were born with (or acquired) limitations that throw normal life out the window.
• a job that was a perfect fit ... until it wasn't.
• a financial plan that somehow turned into financial chaos.
• a church that used to be home and became toxic for you or the family.
• a trusted mentor who ended the relationship and told you to go elsewhere.
• Or ?

From Real Simple Daily Thought

Life swarms with changes. Some of them are so wonderful that we remember them with a smile, embellishing them in memories until they take on epic status. Some changes are so devastating that our scars hurt for years.

"Hello"s and "Goodbye"s share our dreams, our hopes, and our fears. There's no perfect year. Maybe not even a perfect month or week.

Let's focus on the day that is, regardless of the past or future! How?

1. Be grateful for THIS time and place. I keep repeating the "gratitude" mantra, because it resets our complain button to acknowledge that God loves us. Here. Now. This way. THIS IS the day He made; we shall rejoice and be glad IN IT.
2. Take time to evaluate what needs doing and what can be left alone. When life is in motion, I don't have to follow unnecessary rituals. You don't have to tie yourself to every routine.
3. Which resources do you need to negotiate the hello or goodbye? A flowsheet? A mindmap? A trusted adviser? A new car?
4. Look at what you have at hand. Can you partner with friends who are experts in what you don't know? Can you borrow or rent a tool or vehicle? Can you make do with what you have stored?
5. Move through the day. Some days it's enough to put one foot in front of the other. Other days I'll have to swim a deep stream. You'll have to climb a mountain. Or we'll only have enough strength to drop on our knees to beg for wisdom. Show up, whatever your motion!
6. Celebrate the hellos and mourn the goodbyes. No new beginning is perfect. No ending is without its grief. 
7. How mindful can you be? Notice the food you eat, the way your body cooperates, and the feast of possibilities. 

Wishing you a wonderful day in which you live and move and have your being in the Father's love.

Read more:
*You saw how the Lord your God carried you, just as one carries a child, all the way that you traveled. Deuteronomy 1:31 NLT

*He was cut off from the land of the living, stricken for the transgression of my people. Isaiah 53:8 NLT

*Your light will break forth like the dawn, and your healing will quickly appear; then your righteousness will go before you, and the glory of the Lord will be your rear guard. Then you will call, and the Lord will answer; you will cry for help, and he will say: Here am I. Isaiah 58:8-9 NIV

*Was it not necessary that the Messiah should suffer these things and then enter into his glory? Luke 24:26 NLT

*So we have known and believe the love that God has for us. 1 John 4:16

Moravian Prayer: Jesus, our Brother, in your suffering we see the extent to which love can go. You invite us to walk the path of servant love with you. We hesitate, but you promise that we will not be alone as we bring your healing love to a hurting world.

Carry us today, O God, as a loving parent. Encircle us in your arms so we may feel a child-like trust and joy in knowing that we are fully and freely loved and that nothing will ever separate us from you. Amen. 

Choices about handling change

It's frustrating to be a non-techie in an electronics driven household. New tools that cause great excitement among W and the kids produce dread in me. Oh no. They'll move everything around, upgrade the processes I understand, and shake their heads because I don't intuitively "get it."

This morning I wanted to do something simple: put the Kindle on my IPad so I could read a book. My conversation with my genius husband, during several phone calls:

• He:"Are you sure it's not already there?" Yes. I checked.
• I install it and call him back.
• Me: "It's asking for my account. What are the ID and Password you prefer me to use, please." He: "Check email. Because of hacking, this changes often." 
• I find the email. Call him back.
• He: "BTW: don't install it on your IPad. It's better if you put it on your Mac and access it from there..." 
• ...from which it totally deteriorates. He has a unique access ID for the app store on the IPad. Go there and do ? ... After which I'm supposed to install ? on the Mac? But I'll be accessing the Mac-installed version on the IPad... Huh?
• He: "From what you're telling me, it sounds like you've already got the app." Yes, I did that after the first call. But when I open the app it's asking me for access codes and I still need to know which password he wants the app under... etc.
• He: "Forget it. Bring the IPad to lunch and I'll look at it."

We could have started and ended the conversation with the final line.

I don't understand basic terms or processes because the family "fixes" things on computers I use. Shaking their heads when they lose me at Instruction#2, the guys appropriate my gear, put stuff on it, update it ("Oh please hon, don't install updates. Some of them are spam...") and then wonder why I'm destined for the rest of life as a tech idiot. Something happens to my gurus? We'll have piles of electronics rubbish. C,mon and get it!

Sigh. That's what I get for marrying a brilliant computer nerd and having nerdy children. I envy that term in the most complimentary way. I'm not intuitive in electronics or IT: I've never developed the basic understanding of how things work.

[Mind you, the kids would be clueless with my art materials, in design and decor, and in most of the things I do without thinking. I DID train our four kids to cook and clean so the boys would be good husbands and our daughter could run a home. Lucky girl, she's a design whiz and can do most of what I do better, faster, with more zip. And her brothers help her stay current on all the gadgets. Cool.]

If you're struggling with a category of change like I do with computers, what are our choices?

1. Get someone to implement the change and learn how to use it. (I'm forced to do this since it causes the least disruption on a busy spouse's to-do list.)
2. Watch someone manage incremental changes and updates (or read about them) and try to do it yourself next time. Contact an expert when you're out of your depth. This is usually the easiest way to learn. However, when there's extreme discrepancy between skill sets like between my husband and me in tech, it causes a lot of frustration. "Don't you know you can't do that?" they moan, fixing whatever mess or virus I caused. If you don't choose this option, you stay stupid and behind the curve in understanding what's going on. However, you can use the updated technology/ process/ item in limited ways that may be "enough!" for you.
3. Learn the basics and keep adapting. Start from the ground up. Figure out what's going on so you can flow with changes. This is the healthiest option if you are responsible for changes and have to manage them yourself. My husband and kids constantly exchange information and pool their resources. (My apologies to Sunday lunch guests for the occasional "boring" conversations as they update each other. Mind you, techies are delighted. The rest of us zone out until the letters and numbers stop flying around.)

Thank God for making us all different. He surrounds us with help if we are willing to ask. That assistance may not come the way we hope or expect, but there is enough gifting in those around us to get through the days and tasks as it pleases our Master. Questions to ask in seasons of change:

• What should I be learning and doing myself?
• What should I be asking someone to help me with?
• What should I never touch on my own?

Lord have mercy, she says as she hangs up the phone again. He's shaking his head on the other end, hoping she doesn't touch anything.


Read more:
*My thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are your ways my ways, says the Lord. Isaiah 55:8

*Jesus said to Simon and Andrew, “Follow me and I will make you fish for people.” And immediately they left their nets and followed him. Mark 1:17-18 

*(Jesus) "Now that you know these things, God will bless you for doing them."John 13:17
*Be joyful always; pray continually;  give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus. Do not put out the Spirit’s fire;  do not treat prophecies with contempt. Test everything. Hold on to the good. Avoid every kind of evil. May God himself, the God of peace, sanctify you through and through. May your whole spirit, soul and body be kept blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. The one who calls you is faithful and he will do it. 1 Thessalonians 5: 16-24 NIV

Moravian Prayer: Help us to continue to follow you, O Lord. Restore our hearts and renew our minds so that each action and motive may be of service in spreading your good news. Bless the casting of our nets upon the waters of this world, bringing to shore the bounty and beauty of your will. Amen.