Life sorting

Seems like there's always stuff to sort around here! I just got through a major organization effort at the beginning of the year. Now my office and desk look like the Tasmanian Devil from the comic strips whirled through. My online calendars are unreliable: I found an afternoon appointment for today, entered on my phone calendar, that didn't synch to my computer. Who knows what else I missed?

I'm scanning years of university notes, so there are full and half-full boxes of scanned pages. "Keep them until you know if it stored correctly on your computer," warns my husband. So boxes of random notes, in and out of page order, have begun to pile up near the scanner.

For someone whose mind ranges as far and wide as mine, physical order is a must. I tend to pile printouts of interesting ideas. "I'll get to those later today," or "I can read that by week's end," I tell myself. That often is true... but when it's not, the stacks mount into chaotic read-me obligations. Those piles drive me crazy.

Today is a sorting day. Between three appointments (one at home, thank God!), I have to tackle the books, magazines, and papers in this one room. Besides, I need one of the papers for a morning appointment.

Sorting. Sorting. As fast as I can.

No matter how wonderful life it, troubles come. Schedules get interrupted. We get sidetracked by unforseen appointments or information. Perhaps people we know need more attention than we'd planned to give them.

I'm so glad God can keep track of time, people, and everything in this world. He never loses an opportunity to renew and restore, whether it's humanity or nature.

Do you ever feel overwhelmed by everything you could be doing, eating, seeing, or thinking? How do you sort through your possibilities and obligations?

Read more:

*Isaac's men then dug another well, but again there was a dispute over it. So Isaac named it Sitnah (which means 'hostility'). …

From there Isaac moved to Beersheba, where the LORD appeared to him on the night of his arrival. 'I am the God of your father, Abraham,' he said. 'Do not be afraid, for I am with you and will bless you. I will multiply your descendants, and they will become a great nation. I will do this because of my promise to Abraham, my servant.'…

One day King Abimelech came from Gerar with his adviser, Ahuzzath, and also Phicol, his army commander. 'Why have you come here?' Isaac asked. 'You obviously hate me, since you kicked me off your land.'

They replied, 'We can plainly see that the LORD is with you. So we want to enter into a sworn treaty with you. Let's make a covenant.'…

That very day Isaac's servants came and told him about a new well they had dug. 'We've found water!' they exclaimed….

But Esau's wives made life miserable for Isaac and Rebekah. Genesis 26:21, 23–24, 26–28, 32, 35 NLT

*"To whom will you compare me?  Or who is my equal?" says the Holy One.

Lift up your eyes and look to the heavens: Who created all these? He who brings out the starry host one by one and calls forth each of them by name. Because of his great power and mighty strength, not one of them is missing. Isaiah 40:25-26 NIV

*If we live, we live to the Lord, and if we die, we die to the Lord; so then, whether we live or whether we die, we are the Lord’s. Romans 14:8 NLT

Moravian Prayer: Liberating God, we follow your ordinances over the ways of human construction. At times, this may bring criticism upon ourselves, but may we be ever faithful to the way of Christ over any other semblance of law. Amen.

Reflections on regret

This morning I woke up regretting a decision. I awoke gasping at the lost opportunity (until reality set in.)

I did not attend a course. My name tag sat unused on a desk. Administrators had worked for nothing to set up my registration. I missed a class on spiritual formation, a topic that really interests me. And I didn't get to network with a great group of doctoral students.

Many of my best decisions come from impulsively showing up. And so it might have been with this one: I heard about the class Friday (it started the following Monday). I called to ask if I could attend and got permission, along with links to the syllabus and required reading. Ronda even got my student name ready.

But Monday I just couldn't do it. I'd helped pull together a reunion Saturday and gone to a 5-hour workshop Sunday. I facilitate a study on Tuesday evenings and babysit our granddaughter on Fridays. The class just wasn't calling me.

Until this morning, when I realized what I missed and what I could have learned from the prof and wonderful class members. "I could have squeezed it in," said my regretful self. "You need this information for teaching next summer. The Tuesday class was cancelled. Friday's not here yet."

The logical self replied, "Would I have had Monday and Wednesday for research, time needed to start on existing papers? I would have missed lunch with Julia. I needed to decompress after the weekend. Thursday I play piano at the hospital ... and Friday is coming, with or without Kinsey. And look how much time I would have had to take to catch up on reading."

I'm still bummed about missing the week. But here's how I'm facing my regrets:

1. Admit that I've missed a potential opportunity or messed up.
2. Recognize my limitations. We can't be everywhere and do every good thing. No. We really CAN'T!
3. Focus on what I have not what I don't have. This week's research has been very productive, if not creatively stimulating.
4. Make it right if there's transgression on my part. I put a busy administrator through needless work but I can email my appreciation and explain my absence. If I say something awful and hurt a friend, I can apologize and reconcile. I may miss an appointment but can reschedule.
5. Plan ahead to redo something I've missed. Or just let it go. Maybe this great chance didn't belong to me from the get-go.
6. Revel in God's daily presence in the here-and-now. He promises to use each day and every experience for good. We don't live perfectly. But God forgives us. He weaves life's beauty AND imperfections together for his pleasure and our good. 
7. I learn more about myself through the experience. I find I most regret what I don't do rather than what I jump into. While I dislike scheduled obligations, I revel in the surprises and unexpected joys of art workshops, idea exchanges, and mentoring. Since this life is finite, I need to embrace the ways it comes and goes.

How do you deal with regrets and missed opportunities?

Read more:
*For this reason I kneel before the Father, from whom every family in heaven and on earth derives its name. I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.

Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen. Ephesians 3:14-21 NIV

Your personal treasure hunt

Roman treasure coins

What’s your greatest treasure?

Without deliberation, what popped into your head?

·      A person?

·      A possession?

·      An experience?

·      A memory?

·      A future goal?

·      Or ?

“Time,” was my first thought.

Today is the 59^th wedding anniversary of my parents, Art and Adeline. Since childhood, I’ve admired their respect for each other, their devotion to God, and their care for others – especially family. They’ve had different jobs, volunteered in churches and education, but always centered their lives on home and church. Congratulations, Mom and Dad! for time spent together, loving God and each other.

W is spending a week with Kirsten in Austin, looking for a home for her. I’m SO excited that they have time together. One son and his wife are back to work, enjoying evenings and weekends together. Another is alone while his wife recovers at my folks’ place. The youngest is home, probably in his last summer of “student-hood” and relaxation before adult life and work grabs him.

And I? I’m splurging on refreshing and renewal. I don’t turn on the lights at night, letting sundown determine when I sleep. Too dark to read? Must be time for rest. Bright light? Must be time to wake and stir.

View from friends' screen tent

I skip rope for a bit, then take the dogs for a 2-mile walk, mailing one item a day from the local post office. We walk through the tiny lobby, pop the mail into the slot, and walk out back to camp. Then it’s time for brunch. Or reading. Or cleaning a space. Or sitting. Or visiting. Or walking. Or blogging.

Each day is full of options. It flies by without a schedule, without any demands. Friends are coming to stay in a guestroom this weekend and perhaps beyond, but they have their own agendas. Other friends have come on the grounds and we’ll have supper together some evening. Their kids walk the dogs or chatter as they head for the park. Before I know it, it’s time to connect with family on the phone … and then it’s sundown.

Rail tracks shifted in an earthquake

Time. Alone or with others. The minutes and hours and days are precious gifts from God our Father. In misery, they seem endless. In joy, they speed by like tumbleweeds on a prairie, hesitating on the odd memory or event. And not one is truly ours to control.

Enjoy the day, whatever your treasure.

Read more: 

*Sing to the Lord a new song, for he has done marvelous things; his right hand and his holy arm have worked salvation for him. The Lord has made his salvation known and revealed his righteousness to the nations. He has remembered his love and his faithfulness to the house of Israel; all the ends of the earth have seen the salvation of our God. Psalm 98:1-3   NIV 

*O Lord, you are my God; I will exalt you and praise your name, for in perfect faithfulness you have done marvelous things, things planned long ago. Isaiah 25:1 NIV