Lent Day 21: A day of surprises

Over 900 lbs. Who knew fish got
this big? The surprise news item of my day.

Here's what surprised me today:

• I zoned in on my first surprise during morning devotions. I'd never noticed that Jesus ate the Last Supper and washed his disciples' feet before Judas left to betray him. I wonder, have I ever willingly eaten with or "washed the feet" of someone who was about to double-cross me, knowing their intentions? (John 13)
• I love love love speaking in front of a group. (Yeah, I like it that much, which surprises me every time.) Getting up in public makes my heart sing. I feel energized and happy, not nervous. How could it be such fun when I hardly spoke for decades? (My spouse is a gifted communicator so I've heard a lot of great talks. But that's rarely opened the door to speaking opportunities. For an event, you'd book a seasoned pro rather than an unknown part-timer, wouldn't you? Makes sense to me.)
• Speaking makes one a better speaker or "practice makes perfect." This year, W and I preached together most Sundays. It was a new skill for us, started by accident last September: I included him in my first-ever "6-minute-window-before-he-preaches" and he asked me back to the platform during Q&A, after his talk. We've never looked back. Our relaxation while co-speaking comes from confidence in God, trusting our partner, and sharing our voices. Speaking together has made solo talks easier, too.
• People thrive in a healthy team setting. Once again, I've been delighted by the sheer pleasure of a high-functioning team. Kim Martinez (Get Unstuck Bootcamp) facilitated our speech-coaching session today. She rocked as our team leader. Four women presented their talk. The following critique and the discussion were as much fun for me as speaking.
• Our two-year-old granddaughter is pretty good at singing "Happy Birthday." Apparently she's had a lot of peers to practice on lately. I was impressed.
• I laughed aloud with delight at W's bday card. He couldn't find an English one he liked, so it was Spanish - a precursor for guessing meaning in another language (we don't speak Spanish). Funny. And sweet.
• My Indonesian word-of-the-day is kelici (pronounced "cullinchee"). Guess what it means?

My first-ever Spanish birthday card
from my decidedly not Spanish husband

Thank you all for your birthday wishes and the kind words throughout the day. Friends are a true treasure, the best gift I can imagine.

Read more:
*[God says] My hand laid the foundation of the earth, and my right hand spread out the heavens; when I summon them, they stand at attention. Isaiah 48:13 ESV

*For you are all children of God through faith in Christ Jesus. And all who have been united with Christ in baptism have put on Christ, like putting on new clothes. There is no longer Jew or Gentile, slave or free, male and female. For you are all one in Christ Jesus. And now that you belong to Christ, you are the true children of Abraham. You are his heirs, and God's promise to Abraham belongs to you. Galatians 3:26-29 NLT

*For there is one God, and there is one mediator between God and men, the man Christ Jesus, who gave himself as a ransom for all, which is the testimony given at the proper time. 1 Timothy 2:5-6 NLT

*Worship him who made heaven and earth, the sea and the springs of water. Revelation 14:7 ESV

Moravian Prayer: Magnificent Creator, maker of everything—arbiter of distant galaxies, weaver of the very air we breathe—help us to take our proper place in this world you have created and praise your name forever. Amen.

Three checklists: to-dos, maybe-to-dos, and R&R

Today's relaxation: creating my Valentine's bouquet

The coaching session this morning was really helpful. By the end, I'd drawn three lists for next week. (I'm thinking of them with the vocabulary of food, since I'm writing before supper.)

1. The first is a "to-do"list of things seriously on my plate. I must "eat" these before next weekend.

2. Then come the "maybe-to-dos": these items are more like side dishes, nutritional but not essential. They don't have to be consumed next week. I'll slot those projects into the days as they come, according to appetite: "Do I have time to eat this? Do I have enough energy to burn this off?"

3. The final list is "relaxation" = dessert. What would de-stress the day, refresh my spirit, or make me feel like I'm on vacation - or at least on Sabbath?

I prioritize List 3. Without relaxation and refreshment, I don't think creatively. Part of the list includes engagement with others; a significant part focuses on withdrawal to do things I prefer to do alone.

How can we determine the priorities of our to-dos over our "eventually" important tasks? What gets urgent or immediate calendar time vs. more flexibility for long-term events or processes? I used these criteria to create my three lists:

1. List 1: What needs doing? These things have definite consequences if left undone before a deadline - to me personally or professionally. They may also impact others if neglected.
2. List 1/2: What longterm projects need to be started? Some of these go on the "to-do" list, while others are a "maybe," to be done as I have time.
3. List 2: What would I like to get done? These important things may have some consequences but don't significantly change the future without a hard deadline.
4. In scheduling things for the calendar (mostly to-dos), how much time or effort will it take? (Break some things into smaller chunks for better digestion!)
5. List 2: What can I postpone? These "maybe"s are options. They seem to move me toward a goal but are not important enough to prioritize. For instance, some take 15 minutes; if I have that slot of time, I may jump on them and get them out of the way. If not, no big deal.
6. List 3: What refreshes me? For example, I have a coupon for Aveda Spa that expires at the end of February. On my relaxation list is, "Call Emma about going out for a girls' day out." I penciled in a book I've meant to read. And I've noted, "Finish that Korean drama." I don't have to do any of these items, but even writing them down already makes me smile and feel more relaxed.

My new tabletop bouquet of plants
and ceramic painted mushrooms (assembled
after a visit with W to Molbaks Nursery)

When we'd finished the coaching session this morning, I had a clear picture of what a great next week would look like. List 1 would be completed. List 2 would have some checkmarks. I would have done at least a few things from List 3.

How do you decide on your to-dos, maybe-to-dos, and time-outs? If you've found an effective routine or method, please share it with us!

Read more:

*You save humans and animals alike, O Lord. ... With you is the fountain of life; in your light we see light. Psalm 36:6, 9 ESV

*Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. Point out anything in me that offends you, and lead me along the path of everlasting life. Psalm 139:23-24 NLT

*Jesus said in a loud voice, "Let anyone who is thirsty come to me and drink." John 7:37 NIV

*The creation itself will be set free from its bondage to decay and will obtain the freedom of the glory of the children of God. Romans 8:21 ESV

Moravian Prayer: Jesus, Light of the world, thank you for your unfailing love. Help us to put our trust in you. May we look to you for living water and for the Spirit to guide us. In your name we pray.

Creator God, who made us and every creature, the Psalmist tells us that in your unfailing love you preserve both human and beast. Thank you for watching over us and protecting us. We offer praise that through your Son's birth, death, and resurrection we are given freedom from the power of death. Our hope is in you and in the life to come. Amen.

The kaleidoscope of creativity

"Give a mouse a highchair..."

"Look, Oma," she says, handing the mouse a piece of popcorn. Her IKEA mice and goats hang from my drawer pulls. Kinsey nibbles on popped kernels between feeding her dolls.

Our granddaughter's play reminds me of how free-flowing the days were when our kids were little.

No wonder our children think outside the box. We rarely watched TV: we galloped through the neighborhood pizza store or fire station on our field trips, glided past possibilities in our boatload of imagination. We padded through the world, flipping through pages of library books and we stalked adventures as if on cat paws.

Everything in sight was fair game. An item did not just "do" its original function. Anything could serve whatever purpose we dreamed up in the moment. When we put it away, we left its ideas behind and started our next adventure. It wasn't quite Pippi Longstocking, but some days probably came close to her nutty household.

#3 grade pine soffit boards

This year, whether clearing our space or opening the doors of imagination with K, I'm catching glimpses of past creativity.

• Jars of kitchen spices, sniffed, to determine a menu = letting our noses decide how supper should taste.
• Screw-in hooks and metal drywalling corners from the hardware store that made affordable curtain rods (that lace valence stretched across 2 rooms). 
• Stale rice dumped into a huge Tupperware, set in the middle of a blue tarp = an indoor sandbox for rainy Seattle days. 
• Baking science and math curriculum = the kitchen chemistry lab of measuring cups,  the amalgamation of ingredients, oven light on to observe fusion as cookies melted and rose ...) 
• #3 grade pine soffit as 8" floorboards = 20 years of decor satisfaction, even if my dad mentioned that "Grandpa wouldn't use this in a barn" while we were nailing it down.
• Hiring the Paris diplomat's daughter as babysitter ("Please speak only French to the children," when they hadn't heard a word of French before.) Spanish Muzzy - the kids remember how to count three apricots in Spanish to this day.
• Children's magazines as core curriculum: Zoobooks for geography, botany, and zoology curriculum. Ladybug and Cricket magazines as literature. National Geographic Kids as social studies, geography, art, and photography.
  
• Year-end educational testing to see how our homeschoolers measured up to state standards = play dates with a bit of paperwork between. (Yeah, our kids were pretty relaxed during tests.)
• Funeral wreaths tossed into a pile by cemetery maintenance workers, stripped and reused for pinecone wreaths at Christmas. Pinecones also gathered on our walks through the cemetery. (Okay, so my m-i-l thought that was a slightly gruesome robbery. Love you MomK - and weren't the wreaths pretty?)

What's in your hands today? How can you look at resources differently? 

Oh - this just popped into my head because my coaching session today helped me rethink a few of my own assumptions. My mind is churning and sorting. 

I'm a coach as well as being coached. Contact me if you could use a free hour of coaching to talk through a stalemate or look at things a new way. I need a few more clients for the next certification level. Thanks!

Read more:

*My heart exults in the Lord. 1 Samuel 2:1 NEV

*I gave them my Sabbaths, as a sign between me and them. Ezekiel 20:12

*Jesus said, "I came that they may have life, and have it abundantly." John 10:10 ESV

*Abide in my love. I have said these things to you so that my joy may be in you, and that your joy may be complete. John 15:9,11 ESV

Moravian Prayer: As we awaken to a new year, let our first thought be a song of praise to our Father in heaven. For your gift of life, we thank you from the depths of our hearts and we boldly call upon you, Lord, to lead us safely through our time on earth. In Jesus' name we pray. 

Praise God, praise God, praise God. We love you, we honor you, we sing to you praises of joy. Praise God, praise God, praise God. Your mercy, compassion, and grace are our strength and anchor. Hear our songs, O Lord. Amen.

The power of a simple idea

Through a screen ... darkly

My coach Angela and I had only 20 minutes in our group-mentor meeting. The worst of it? My head was spinning and I didn't have a clear idea on what I wanted to be coached. What a morning!

But we launched in. Got focus. Before long, I had a solution for my inner head-cloud and the procrastination that's dogged me since pre-Thanksgiving travels.

By now, you know I'm visual. When spaces around me get messy, my thoughts go fuzzy and disarranged. W's shifting his office from upstairs to the basement. In the process, my almost-done office and the rest of the flat are heaped with boxes, books, gear, and garbage. There's no way to get around that: the moving process is chaotic. And my headroom was utterly clogged.

"Why don't you get out of the house while I work on this tomorrow?" W suggested, noting my paralysis on the sofa yesterday.

So this morning I went to "the Boat," our friends' refuge, floating on Lake Union. 

the panoramic view of my perch...

I plugged in their hotspot and called into the coach meeting. The fantastic thing about coaching is that the issues discussed and the solutions are relevant to the client BECAUSE they come up with those ideas. Ideally, the coach asks questions but the client is in control of the conversation. Angela, a trusted friend, helped me find a workable solution to the clutter in my head and the resulting procrastination. 

Our high-tech solution? Paper. Well, pen and paper.

The question she asked? "What has worked for you in the past, to help you get things done on time?"

Into my memory popped the 3"X3" calendar I carried each college semester. I'd note assignments and deadlines in the minute squares as soon as faculty handed out their syllabi. The pages ordered my days, weeks, and months. I saw at a glance what was expected.

Grid dot notebook

I don't know why computer calendars don't do the same thing for me. Even when I'm logged in, I forget to check them. When they don't sync, I'm lost. On the other hand, the info on that little calendar was available in a blink of an eye. Everywhere I went. Without plugging in. I just pulled it out of my pocket.

My solution for managing our transition through June is equally simple. In the the grid-dot notebook a friend gave me this Christmas, I'm going to draw a monthly calendar-at-a-glance. I'll use the subsequent pages to sketch ideas and write to-dos.

During our closing minute, Angela asked, "Can you summarize what you're planning to do?" and I added a missing piece: I'm going to write down where task-related things are stored - online links, physical spaces, who has info, etc.

The weight that dropped off my brain was staggering. The load lifted. I have clear direction that will WORK for me and my style of categorization. 

Stumped? Stymied? How about checking in with a coach - for one session or more? Usually sessions are an hour; you can accomplish a LOT in that time. Clients often find a simple idea - something they already know - that helps them out of gridlock and into the next phase of life and work. I highly recommend it, especially after finding my "simple aha!" this morning.

Yeah, I'm a coach, and my clients say I'm a good one. But I'd gladly refer you if you'd rather talk to someone else. Contact me at rosemee at hot mail dot com for more info. 

Blessings - and hopes for positive forward movement in becoming the best person you can be - and reaching your goals in this New Year.

Those golden opportunities

Do you ever look back in amazement on the things you've done and place you've been? I sure do.

Tomorrow, we have a golden opportunity to study under Master Coach Linda Miller. A bunch of us have signed up and are anticipating new info, skills, and tools. Her "About Coaching" page includes this quote: "First say to yourself what you would be; and then do what you have to do" (Epictetus). I want to be a better coach, so I'm taking coaching lessons.

What do you want to be?

Past life: musician and music teacher

How can you find out who you want to be and seize the opportunity to do what you need to do?

1. Observe who you have been in the past. As a musician since childhood, I've always been interested in the arts. Is there something you've worked at before? Did you study a subject, play on a team, or excel in a certain area? How has that shaped who you are today?
2. Think about what interests you and fulfills you in the present. When we moved to England, I reinvented myself as an "artist" to take art lessons. No one knew my past and no one cared that I'd only painted a few times at community center lessons. I was welcomed as an artist because I identified myself that way. Cool! Easy, too. How do you present yourself to others at work, at home, and in the community? Is this how you want to be seen and known?



Printmaking course by April Richardson

3. Consider who you want to be in the future. I don't have much access to a piano now but my paints are nearby. When my "art energy" charges up, I pull them out to play around. I love the memories that each painting evokes in me and want to increase that skill. I'll have to pick up my brushes often to improve my paintings. What gives you joy? Do you want to become known as a kind and unselfish person? A skilled wordsmith? A patient helper? A follower of Jesus who truly reflects God's goodness? What do you need to do to make your aspirations a reality?

Read more:

*You search out my path and my lying down, and are acquainted with all my ways. Psalm 139:3 NIV

*Give praise to the Lord, proclaim his name; make known among the nations what he has done. Sing to him, sing praise to him; tell of all his wonderful acts. Glory in his holy name; let the hearts of those who seek the Lord rejoice. Look to the Lord and his strength; seek his face always. Psalm 105:1-4 NIV

*Do not worry about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. Philippians 4:6 NIV

*... addressing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody to the Lord with your heart, giving thanks always and for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ ... Ephesians 5:19-20 ESV

Moravian Prayer: Loving Father, you know us so well. You know when we rise and when we lie down. Help us to show our thankfulness to you by all we do and say, holy Father. Amen.

A hopeful day indeed

Six of us sit around a table at Third Place Commons this morning. Our table is a cross-sawn log, an enormous tree felled in its prime. We rest our cups and saucers and sandwich plates on the resin tabletop and discuss relationships, ministry, and future plans.

Our hour together includes sharing our lives and dreams, introductions to new ministries and resources, prayer for each other, and a banana muffin and tea from the Honey Bear Bakery. All it takes is the simple intentionality of meeting in time and place to be able to share direction and celebrate our wins together.

The sun's out on this hopeful day. It's time for a walk to think and pray about Sunday's sermon at Neighborhood Church. I'm grateful for peers in ministry who encourage, coach, and release me to the calling of God.

What do your friends and coworkers contribute to your hopeful days?

Read more:
*You shall meditate on the book of the law day and night, so that you may be careful to act in accordance with all that is written in it. Joshua 1:8 NLT

*They did not conquer the land with their swords; it was not their own strong arm that gave them victory. It was your right hand and strong arm and the blinding light from your face that helped them, for you loved them. You are my King and my God. You command victories for Israel. Only by your power can we push back our enemies; only in your name can we trample our foes.

I do not trust in my bow; I do not count on my sword to save me. You are the one who gives us victory over our enemies; you disgrace those who hate us. O God, we give glory to you all day long and constantly praise your name." Psalm 44:3–8 NLT

*Jesus said, “Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but only the one who does the will of my Father in heaven.” Matthew 7:21 NLT

*... That is why we labor and strive, because we have put our hope in the living God, who is the Savior of all men, and especially of those who believe. 1 Timothy 4:9-10 NIV

Moravian Prayer: Happy are those who follow God’s commandments, who obey him with all their heart! Help us, Lord, to live righteous lives. Teach us the Father’s will that we may please him. We ask this in your sacred name. Amen.

Four evaluation steps during transition

I've worked through four levels of evaluation in transition to my next ministry calling.

I started my process at the bottom of the chart by listing simple "pros and cons." Since then, each tier has propelled me forward in defining the new mission:

1. Pros and cons: Start a transition by asking, "What's good or bad about this?" Consider the advantages and disadvantages of staying in place or moving forward. This gives you a Yes/No answer.

• Think about Caleb and Joshua's courageous decision to conquer the (humanly) unconquerable Promised Land. When others said, "It's too awful. Too terrifying. Too much. Plus we're too weak!" ... these two men boldly said, "If God is with us, we can take the giants, the hill country, and the challenges." (Numbers 13)

2. Possibilities and threats: "What are the risks of engagement, compared to possible achievements?" What could happen? Is God directing this? We ask trusted mentors to stand with us as we consider a big move.

• Jonathan and his armor bearer demonstrate brave exploration. They were already out of the camp; yet they took a big chance for a potentially huge win. "Let's go for it. I've got your back," says Jonathan's teammate. (1 Samuel 14) This is where we shout out before scaling the cliff, to see if God is in it and others agree.

3. Multiplication and stasis: Our choice is to stay with what we have ... or offer everything to God. We ask, "Is God in charge? Or do we need to retain control?" God blows out our paradigms of what is possible by taking over. We ask: "What could happen that we don't know about? Do we trust God, even if it's going to be a wild ride?" We know we lose everything by holding on to what we have.

• Jesus multiplies the loaves and fishes. What might God do with our willing sacrifice and utter abandonment? Everything is fair game at this point, even a boy's lunch. (Remember, the youngster has lost his meal at this point.) (Matthew 14:19;15:36; Luke 5:6;9:3-17). BTW: God never offers a small consolation prize for disobedience.

4. Resonance and resistance: In refining options, we evaluate our place in the story. What "rings our bells" because it matches our gifts and calling? On the other hand, what produces an instinctive resistance? How can we use the resonance and resistance to define what "moving forward" looks like?

• Remember "Thy will be done," from the Lord's Prayer. Think of Jesus at key points of defining his mission. His baptism. Enduring his temptations. Moving through ministry to the applause or scorn of people. Here, we constantly ask: "Does this glorify our Father in heaven? Is this what He is calling US to do ... or does this opportunity belong to someone else?" (Matthew 6:9-13)

I don't know Step 5. I'll pass it along, when I find out!

What parts of these steps match or disagree with what you've experienced during transitions?

It's a wonderful life

My sabbatical came to a crashing halt Sunday. While W represented NU in Montana, I enjoyed the NWMN conference in Coeur D'Alene, Idaho, until Wednesday. My coaching and ministry friends and I visited throughout the event. What fun! I appreciate the investment of friends old and new in us.

In two weeks, I start TESOL classes (teaching English to speakers of other languages). Seattle is full of non-English speakers, so I've wanted to take the course for a while. Since NU offers the 4 semesters required for certification in 4 weeks of summer school, I might as well plunge in.

When that's done, we're on our way to teach in SE Asia. W gets to teach theology, which he loves. I still have course prep to finish: as usual, it's a course new to me and not my main interest. Thank God for faculty friends who loaned me their notes. I'm teaching their courses in their names. (Thanks, Lois! and Barbara.)

We've found good house-sitters, which helps make the time away easy. Our big family reunion and a 60th anniversary arrive in August, but we will celebrate that at our cabin. So... life is swiftly moving along. I'll be training for a new job, come fall. More on that later.

It's time to catch a deep breath and plunge right in!

How can we transition in busy seasons, where everything we've done comes together into "whatever that looks like next"?

1. Know who we are and who God is. Get our bearings before we cross the bridge of transition or launch the boat for the distant shore.
2. Know what we love and want to do. What makes our hearts sing? What's a good fit? (On the flip side, what would we most dread doing, no matter what the paycheck?)
3. Gather our assets. Pull together the education, experience, and other resources - including friends and coworkers - who will help us realize the future.
4. Write down a plan and our action steps. (If you can't figure those out, get a coach. I'm one, and would love to help you in a session or more. You'll be amazed how much you accomplish in a coaching hour!)
5. Begin to move in the direction of the next thing. Use what we know, because some parts of a new season won't appear until we're on our way.
6. Gather advisers - spiritual, mental, emotional, even physical - who are willing and ready to assist us. Let's listen to them and let their counsel guide our transitional process. 
7. Make sure God is with us each step of the way. Keep our spiritual flame alight and "hot": this is not the time to reduce our spiritual disciplines and devotions.
8. Embrace change. Transition is a wild uncertain ride, filled with joys and traumas. We're leaving behind the past for an unknown future. If God is in it, we'll be okay. And the future will be more astonishing and crazy-wonderful than we can imagine.

Read more:

*I will exalt you, my God the King; I will praise your name for ever and ever. Every day I will praise you and extol your name for ever and ever. Great is the Lord and most worthy of praise; his greatness no one can fathom. Psalm 145:1-3 NIV

*I will make with you an everlasting covenant. Isaiah 55:3 NLT

*For this reason we must pay much closer attention to what we have heard, so that we do not drift away from it. For if the word spoken through angels proved unalterable, and every transgression and disobedience received a just penalty,  how will we escape if we neglect so great a salvation?

After it was at the first spoken through the Lord, it was confirmed to us by those who heard, God also testifying with them, both by signs and wonders and by various miracles and by gifts of the Holy Spirit according to His own will. Hebrews 2:1-4  NASB

*We do not want you to become lazy, but to imitate those who through faith and patience inherit what has been promised. Hebrews 6:12 (NIV)

Moravian Prayer: Lord, you named yourself “I Am that I Am” – a title of stability in a world that is confusing and ever changing, with new aims and ways to achieve them almost daily. Satisfyingly, we keep our eyes fixed on you, our one destination, knowing its way. Amen.

What's up, Coach?

Have you ever felt "stuck" in place? Had dreams or goals without moving forward? Did you see a need and didn't know how to make a difference?

Me too! I spent four hours this week, coaching and being coached. My coaches started our hour with: "Rosemarie, what would you like to talk about today?" They gently directed questions to make me pause, think about my vision for work or ministry, and help me commit to moving forward through specific "I will do this" action steps.

Coaching is a great venue for sorting what we know. It helps us design a future that from our vantage point may look like,

• "I wonder if I could try something."
• "I wish I could do ..." 
• "Oh no, what now? Where do I go from here?"
• "If I could run this past someone, it might become clearer."
• Wondered if you're headed in a direction that is true to your values, talents, or skills?

Mentoring brings another person's experience or knowledge to help you, but coaching unlocks your own thinking and preferred processes. It helps you choose your own "next steps" to walk - at your own pace. It guides you through ideas and actions that may not be on your horizon yet - or that you might overlook without someone "thinking alongside" you. Coaches help you build accountability to keep you on track, too.

Coaches meet their clients in person, on the phone, on Skype ... whatever suits the client best. Many coaches prefer an hour online or on the phone since it keeps coach and client on task and time.

I'm working toward coach certification and need some coaching hours. As your coach, I'll ask questions and reflect back what you're thinking. But the conversation belongs to you. Together, we'll listen to God's voice and direction, speaking through your heart and your mind. Every conversation is strictly confidential. "Payment" can include anything from my $35/hr fee to a traded service to cup of tea (or reciprocal coaching by another coach). First session is free for the first 15 clients.

Interested? Email me (click here) if you might benefit from coaching. Include two "best dates" where you can set aside an uninterrupted hour. (Likely, one will fit my calendar.)

Read more:

*One day King Abimelech came from Gerar with his adviser, Ahuzzath, and also Phicol, his army commander. 'Why have you come here?' Isaac asked. 'You obviously hate me, since you kicked me off your land.'

They replied, 'We can plainly see that the LORD is with you. So we want to enter into a sworn treaty with you. Let's make a covenant. Swear that you will not harm us, just as we have never troubled you. We have always treated you well, and we sent you away from us in peace. And now look how the LORD has blessed you!' Genesis 26:26–29 NLT

*My heart, O God, is steadfast. I will sing and make music with all my soul. Awake, harp and lyre! I will awaken the dawn. I will praise you, Lord, among the nations; I will sing of you among the peoples. For great is your love, higher than the heavens; your faithfulness reaches to the skies. Be exalted, O God, above the heavens; let your glory be over all the earth. Psalm 108:1-5 NIV

*Teach me to do your will, for you are my God. Let your good spirit lead me on a level path. Psalm 143:10 NLT

*Yes, and from ancient days I am he. No one can deliver out of my hand. When I act, who can reverse it? Isaiah 43:13 NIV

 *Christ himself is before all things, and in him all things hold together. Colossians 1:17 NLT

*Do not be carried away by all kinds of strange teachings; for it is well for the heart to be strengthened by grace. Hebrews 13:9 NLT

Moravian Prayer: God of past, present, and future; things temporal and eternal; everlasting life and daily living: for all time you have held all things together - what decision, then, could we make without your instruction? Help us not to separate your authority from matters we enjoy ruling for ourselves.

O Word who doesn’t fit on a page, we sometimes use scripture to fit our agendas. Forgive us for cheapening the complexities of your nature and your way by considering only the verses that serve our aim. Let your Spirit lead us to a deeper study of scripture. Amen.

Lent Day 37: Too dumb to know better?

Really bad. Really good. It's been one of those days. We classmates almost thought we knew what we were doing yesterday. Today we're sure we have no clue! I sat in the back of the room today to watch more and ask less. (Not sure that worked!)

In the first segment on "How to ask good coaching questions," I asked a dreadful question. The person to whom it was addressed felt defensive and unguarded. My "neutral curiosity" went unsatisfied and s/he didn't get any further in the journey.

I'm glad I typed verbatim notes as we were talking. I plan to examine what I actually said to see why the client - and most of the class- heard it the way they did, rather than how I intended to communicate. I'd like to avoid such crash-and-burnouts in future, both for the coaching client and for me.

In a later session, I remarked on something that seemed obvious to me. The lead trainer said, "Wow. In 10 years of coaching, I've never had someone come up with that observation. That was excellent." (HA HA; I bet raw recruits are like me. = We don't have a clue what we know and don't know, most of the time.)

If our personal worth resulted from any part of "good" or "bad" learning, we would have been in heaven and hell today. Yet no one cares about our failure but we. I chuckled when someone sitting nearby whispered, "Glad it was you, not me," after I flamed out. The class joked about "the awful question" all day.

I marvel at and relish the learning process. My way to understand new information comes from handling the material - sometimes aloud in a group - turning it over and over until it makes sense. Others students sit and listen, processing internally. Still others write everything down, going over the information at home. I wonder how Jesus learned best. If he was quick and nimble or careful and methodical.

No matter what class I'm in, I love to learn. I am insatiably interested in God's work among us. I want to know why people think and feel and act as they do. What is God doing that we can join? And what do we know or have that can help each other?

Thanks to our coaches for great demonstrations, to our coworkers for courage and spunk in the interactions, and especially, thanks be to God for his unsearchable riches in Christ Jesus. What a great day, the weird and the amazing moments included.

How's your day gone? Got any highlights to share? Any disasters to ponder?

Read more:
*'Blessed be the name of God from age to age, for wisdom and power are his. Daniel 2:20 NLT

*The Lord is my strength and my might; he has become my salvation. Psalm 118:14 NLT

*I delight in the way of your decrees as much as in all riches. Psalm 119:14 NLT*The world's sin is that it refuses to believe in me. John 16:9 NLT

*Where is the one who is wise? Has not God made foolish the wisdom of the world? 1 Corinthians 1:20 NLT

*May the God of peace make you complete in everything good so that you may do his will, working among us that which is pleasing in his sight, through Jesus Christ, to whom be the glory forever and ever. Hebrews 13:20,21 NLT

Moravian Prayer: Lord, work through us and in us today so we may delight in your way and show this way to others. We wish to bring peace to those around us in need of calm and completeness.

God, you are not a God of vengeance, cruelty, greed, or hate. Why have we not learned this? You call us against the world’s standards to love foolishly in all things. Help us to live your way of love. Amen.

Lent Day 36: What excites you?

Jodi Detrick is one of three master coaches teaching us principles of coaching. She exclaimed, "When I took coach training, I found what I was made for." (R paraphrase)

I'm with Jodi. I would be honored to copycat her any day of the week, but this instance would actually be a good fit. At the end of the day, the coaching practise (on fellow class members) felt relaxing AND energizing. As I listened to the stories and watched the process of coaching, I experienced God's delight at the various journeys of His children. For me, coaching and observing the coaching process resonated as an act of worship.

Many came to the class already gifted in helping others find their way. These learners are filling their toolbox with new tools.

For some, the coaching ideas were new and a stretch: "I didn't know what questions to ask." "I didn't know what to say as the coach." "I found myself giving advice from my experience instead of listening to what the person I was coaching wanted to talk about." Luckily, we have a few more days to clarify expectations and methodology.

Have you ever had someone say, "Find and follow your passion!" That's a stale-sounding buzz-phrase. What's passion, after all?

Whatever God has wired us to do will resonate from the tip of our head to the soles of our feet. We will find joy and completeness - or "our passion" - when we function in our design. It's worth taking the risk to fulfill the niche for which you and I are here, in this place, at this time, with our education (or lack of it), our personality, and our experience.

Whether or not you are an emotionally "passionate" person, embracing God's calling in YOUR work - whether that is at an assembly-line job or a creative flinging about the world - will produce harmony, peace, and wholeness. Jesus showed us how a human could live in perfect alignment to the Father, moving with joy and expectation through each wonderful and terrible day.

Our spiritual act of worship includes offering our bodies to God. We use our bodies to work. To play. To create. To restore. To produce. To rest.

Does the way you use your body each day glorify God and bring you healthy and holistic pleasure?

Read more:
*The boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places; I have a goodly heritage. Psalm 16:6 NLT

*God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea, though its waters roar and foam and the mountains quake with their surging. Psalm 46:1-3 NIV

*Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving. Colossians 3:23-24 NIV

Moravian Prayer: In you, O Christ, all boundaries have fallen away. You taught us to see each other as siblings and friends, and invited us to see you in the faces of those in need. This day, may it be so. Amen.

What to do when you're not your mother (or your father)

I like pretty things. There. I admit it. That's no surprise to those who know me. I get that from my mom.

Growing up, I tried to be like my mom and like the things my mother liked in clothes, decor, and social interactions. Yet I consistently fought off things that were feminine and frilly. I was impatient with her attention to detail. It's still not my style to dress up and put on makeup, though it's become my habit (after a lecture from women I trust: "Your makeup isn't for you. It's for those of us who have to look at you all day long." Ha ha. I got the point.)

I eventually gave up and realized I'm not my mom. I've learned a lot from her but I'm more like Dad. That's not a bad thing, eh, Dad? But once in a while - even today - I wish I were more like my mother.

Classic 1960s French roll

My mom kept her house in perfect order. She still works like a slave to dust and cook and clean. She actually likes doing laundry and finds ironing soothing. She's kept Dad's clothes spotless and pressed so he looks sharp. (Sure, once in a while he escapes in his flannel plaid shirts to his workshop.)

Mom dressed up. Always. Her hair was twisted in a French bun, immaculately held in place by a few bobby pins and hairspray. We all wore our "Sunday best" to go to the doctor's or dentist. Mom attired my brothers in little suits for church. She sewed amazing dresses for me, many of which I disliked because the colors and patterns didn't feel good to me. Even then, I knew what I liked, right, Mom?

I look at those photos of us as a family, beautifully decked out in the current fashions - and admire my mom. She has classic taste with her own chic twist. She was always in style, trendy and fashionable in minis in her 30s and early 40s. (Those were the 1970s, after all.) And she has classic beauty today, in her 70s.

I'm as happy in jeans and ugly sweatshirts as I am dressed to the nines. (Maybe happier.) I don't care much if my hair is cooperating or not. I cut it myself in the shower, where I can feel the wet shape I'm sculpting. I look in the mirror in the morning and hope for the best thereafter, ignoring the huge mirrors throughout my home and office that reflect light and space.

I've wished I were more like my mother when I've given in to my natural inclination and find myself ignored by customer service: "She's plain." To me, "What do you want?" Yup, it makes a difference to show up fully armed for retail with makeup and decent clothes.

My mom's special on the inside, too. She loves God and seeks to follow him closely. She's friendly, kind, and a caring servant. SHE has the gift of mercy and not an enemy in the world, the peacemaker in her family and among her confidants.

Me? Not so much. I often ask myself, "What would Mom do?" when I feel like rushing into war with a battle cry, as is my inclination. Ok, I admit I'm not always good at asking that ... and find myself and others bloodied around me. Lord have mercy!

How can we benefit from knowing others with admirable traits that we don't have ... without becoming envious or feeling belittled?

1. Keep admiring. You become what you behold. (Or you get closer, anyway.)
2. Thank God for that person and pray for them. That way you add to their strength rather than comparing yourself unfavorably.
3. Learn every lesson you can. Imitate the good in others to grow stronger yourself.
4. Believe and rejoice in a God who loves variety. He made me different than Mom "because you have a different job to do," as she's told me more than once.
5. Live as yourself. God lavished his loving creativity on us; we have unique abilities, experiences, and momentum to live large and beautifully in our own life and space.
6. Look around to see who you can boost, people like you and not like you.

 Who's your hero? Whom do you admire?

Mom, you're definitely high on my list. Love you! and I still want to be like you, even in my 50s.

Read more:
*When you enter the land the Lord your God is giving you, do not learn to imitate the detestable ways of the nations there. Let no one be found among you who sacrifices their son or daughter in the fire, who practices divination or sorcery, interprets omens, engages in witchcraft, or casts spells, or who is a medium or spiritist or who consults the dead. Anyone who does these things is detestable to the Lord; because of these same detestable practices the Lord your God will drive out those nations before you. You must be blameless before the Lord your God. Deuteronomy 18:9-13

*Even if you had ten thousand guardians in Christ, you do not have many fathers, for in Christ Jesus I became your father through the gospel. Therefore I urge you to imitate me. For this reason I have sent to you Timothy, my son whom I love, who is faithful in the Lord. He will remind you of my way of life in Christ Jesus, which agrees with what I teach everywhere in every church. 1 Corinthians 4:15-17

*... our gospel came to you not simply with words but also with power, with the Holy Spirit and deep conviction. You know how we lived among you for your sake. You became imitators of us and of the Lord, for you welcomed the message in the midst of severe suffering with the joy given by the Holy Spirit. And so you became a model to all the believers in Macedonia and Achaia. 1 Thessalonians 1:5-7

Passing on the glory

Mentoring and coaching affirm and boost skills and opportunities in others. It's not that hard to find people who claim to be a mentor or coach, but quality varies widely.

I LOVE my coach, Jodi Detrick. She clarifies my thinking, asks thoughtful questions that make me pause to consider options, and helps put my goals into focus. Her assistance and counsel opened several doors for me this spring that I would never have been able to pass through alone. Without self-promotion or hesitation, she's done the same for many influencial leaders across the nation. Thanks, Jodi!

David's trials with his son Absalom spotlight the humility, generosity, and astonishing character of Barzillai the Gileadite (2 Samuel 19:31-39). Absalom rebels and chases his father from Jerusalem, Barzillai stands by his king, providing supplies and assistance. As David returns after Absalom's insurrection ends, he offers Barzillai a place in the King's palace, benefits of influence and access, and a seat at his table.

The old man is a realist. "I'm 80, and rich food and influence don't really interest me. However, there's someone I value, someone who has served well, and who would benefit from your offer. Let me present my servant Kimham. I'd love to promote him because I can't take full advantage of your kindness myself."

Kimham got his big break when he worked for Barzillai. But the old man went beyond mentoring and giving good job reviews. He placed his protegee in the seat of power to his own loss, boosting him into circles of high influence, catapulting him into King David's inner circle. The prophet Jeremiah mentions a city named after Kimham (Jer. 41:17), though we don't read any more about the younger man's exploits with David or his sons. It was up to Kimham to live up to his opportunity.

Some mentors offer advice and training, but feel threatened, resentful, and angry when their servant becomes greater than they, when their hireling achieves stardom, or when the mentor is left behind. Such greedy leaders note their own stalemate and erect roadblocks for underlings instead of continually pushing others forward. They promote themselves, sabotage others' good ideas, and fight to stay on top of their hierarchical heap.

I wish I'd had a boss like Barzillai. Growing up, my own dad created great expectations of such leadership. I've watched him shamelessly encourage and promote employees and younger talent who showed any lick of ambition or courage. Every eager and gifted employee longs for a promoter and booster like him.

Like my father, I am determined to copy Barzillai, rejoicing when people I mentor surpass my abilities and achievements.

If you have position or power in your organization, deliberately step back from the limelight to promote others. Help them excel beyond your sphere of authority. Boost them to pass you by, do better than you, and make you proud as they stand on your strong shoulders.

When someone who once worked for you becomes great in the ocean outside your little fishpond, let them name you as the fearless, honest power broker who made them shine. This is the only way your influence can expand and lives on through others' greater glory and achievements.

Like Barzillai, you will become known and admired in wide circles beyond any grappling, politicking, or self-protection that promotes your own interests and hard-won executive post. Live big! (I promise it won't make you smaller.)

Read more:
*Barzillai the Gileadite also came down from Rogelim to cross the Jordan with the king and to send him on his way from there. Now Barzillai was a very old man, eighty years of age. He had provided for the king during his stay in Mahanaim, for he was a very wealthy man.

The king said to Barzillai, “Cross over with me and stay with me in Jerusalem, and I will provide for you.”

But Barzillai answered the king, “How many more years will I live, that I should go up to Jerusalem with the king? I am now eighty years old. Can I tell the difference between what is good and what is not? Can your servant taste what he eats and drinks? Can I still hear the voices of men and women singers? Why should your servant be an added burden to my lord the king? Your servant will cross over the Jordan with the king for a short distance, but why should the king reward me in this way? Let your servant return, that I may die in my own town near the tomb of my father and mother. But here is your servant Kimham. Let him cross over with my lord the king. Do for him whatever pleases you.”

The king said, “Kimham shall cross over with me, and I will do for him whatever pleases you. And anything you desire from me I will do for you.”

So all the people crossed the Jordan, and then the king crossed over. The king kissed Barzillai and gave him his blessing, and Barzillai returned to his home. When the king crossed over to Gilgal, Kimham crossed with him. All the troops of Judah and half the troops of Israel had taken the king over. 2 Samuel 19: 31-40 NIV